tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-85029197433039641972023-11-16T09:59:19.742-06:00fear nothing. risk everything.Lindsayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01769555972790205358noreply@blogger.comBlogger23125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8502919743303964197.post-38251450104074039472017-07-30T22:05:00.002-05:002017-07-30T22:05:28.576-05:00Netflix and Chill<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Does anyone else remember the thrill of going to Blockbuster and browsing the new releases? Mitch and I had a conversation not that long ago that our girls will never walk through a video store to pick out a movie. Ahhh, we.are.old (and awesome).</div>
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Anyway, there is a point to this title and it does link back to me and my "cancer journey" (I really hate that term but I'm not sure what else I would call it at this point). I've talked in previous blogs about the 5 year stretch and how, if I can make it cancer-free for 5 years, I'm pretty much in the clear. That is one benefit to being handed the mother of all cancers, at least my risk of recurrence drops off dramatically once I reach that milestone.</div>
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Unlike other types of breast cancer, however, there is really nothing I can take to help prevent the cancer from returning. ER+ ladies have Tamoxifen and other medications. HER2+ ladies have Herceptin, for at least a year. Us triple negative ladies, we just have our good looks.</div>
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So now that I am in full blown survivor mode, I started looking for anything I can do to prevent round 2 of this awful disease. We already know that I have a higher risk than most, due to my genetics, so I already feel a little doomed from the start. But instead of crawling into bed with a pint of ice cream to drown my sorrows, I'm using it as a kick in the @$$ to get my life together. Which brings us to Netflix...</div>
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I discovered the documentary genre when I was on maternity leave with Evelyn and was awake nursing her through the night (Netflix app on phone plus a solid pair of earbuds was heavenly during those late night feeds). I had watched a few health documentaries then, but never really took their message to heart.</div>
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Now with a different perspective, I have found a lot of good (and not so good) information in these documentaries that have given me that motivation I need to make a real change in our lifestyle. So if you have a Netflix account and haven't seen these, I highly recommend:</div>
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<a href="http://michaelpollan.com/books/in-defense-of-food/" target="_blank">In Defense of Food</a> (2015)- Michael Pollan is a fantastic writer and the brains behind this documentary. He bases it off of a book he wrote with the same title (which is pretty dry, in my honest opinion, but his first book "The Omnivore's Dilemma" was fantastic) and the documentary looks at how our diet impacts our health. Then he offers practical advice on how to improve your diet to improve your health. And it is simple to remember:</div>
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IF your great grandmother wouldn't recognize it as food, don't eat it!</div>
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My other top pick is:</div>
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<a href="http://thecwordmovie.com/" target="_blank">The C Word</a> (2015)- This is the second film in my top two. This takes a short departure from the topic of food and diet and looks at all lifestyle factors, particularly focused on how they relate to the growth of cancer cells. The documentary is based on the book "Anticancer: A new way of life" that examines 4 major pillars in the fight against cancer:</div>
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1. Diet</div>
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2. Exercise</div>
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3. Environmental toxins</div>
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4. Stress reduction</div>
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While I will have so much more to say about this in future posts, I want to say right now that this movie/book changed my mindset. Yes I know I should exercise. And yes, I could eat better. But it was this documentary that convinced me that I need to do those things NOW. It gave me hope that maybe there is something I can do to fight this, instead of waiting around for it to come back a second time. It gave me a sense of control. Of power. Of passion. And while I can't say I've followed these pillars every day, or every week for that matter, I have started to make smarter choice about what I expose my body to on a daily basis.</div>
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I am reading the book that accompanies this film to really dive into the science behind this lifestyle. I hope to post more about this in the future once I finish the book, not only to give myself some accountability to its philosophy, but also to share that knowledge with all of you. Because even though most of you reading this haven't had cancer, or don't have broken DNA like I do, EVERYONE can benefit from a healthier lifestyle. And if you could prevent yourself from getting cancer, would you? (The answer should be yes).</div>
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I will leave you with that thought tonight and challenge all of you to take the time to do something better for yourself this week. Invest in your health, you never know when you may not have it...</div>
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<br />Lindsayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01769555972790205358noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8502919743303964197.post-49652349420876447332017-07-13T22:28:00.001-05:002017-07-15T21:40:34.999-05:00Rebirth Today marks 1 year from my cancer diagnosis. While I didn't technically receive the call until the 17th, I consider the 15th (the day I had my mammogram/biopsy) "the day" because driving home from that appointment, I knew. I didn't want to admit it, but I knew.<div><br></div><div>Somehow it snuck up on me. Blame it on a new job (which I'm LOVING) or life with kids or my lack of a calendar but 1 long trip around the sun later and I'm on the other side, wondering if it was all a dream. It feels like so much has happened, yet life still feels the same.</div><div><br></div><div>When you have cancer, your path is already paved for you. It takes you from appointment to appointment, exam table to treatment chair and back again, requiring very little conscious thought or energy. So many wonderful people volunteer to watch your kids and make you meals and shave your head. You are fighting for your life. You are brave and strong and an inspiration.</div><div><br></div><div>Then treatment is over and life returns to normal. The appointments become less frequent, the conversations revolve less around side effects and more around what's for dinner. Life slows down and gets a bit sweeter. You start appreciating things more, like time with friends and family, the smell of a summer breeze. But the mundane events of everyday life eventually creep back in and you find yourself caught between "enjoy every moment!" And "get in the ****ing van!".</div><div><br></div><div>But then, in that quiet place in your mind, where we all go before we sleep at night, the relief of remission turns to fear of recurrence. </div><div><br></div><div style="text-align: center;">What if the cancer comes back?</div><div style="text-align: center;">What if I don't notice it until it's too late?</div><div style="text-align: center;">Am I doing everything I can to prolong my life?</div><div style="text-align: center;"><br></div><div style="text-align: left;">This is tough stuff kids. Facing your own mortality isn't for the faint of heart, but neither is a cancer diagnosis. It robs us of so many things, peace of mind being one of them. With every major milestone, birthday, etc. I find myself thinking, </div><div style="text-align: left;"><br></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">Did we take enough photos?</span></div><div style="text-align: center;">Was I in any of them?</div><div style="text-align: center;">Is this the video my kids will watch to remember me? </div><div style="text-align: center;">Will they remember my voice, my smile, my laugh?</div><div style="text-align: center;">Will they remember how fiercely I loved them and their dad?</div><div style="text-align: center;">Will I be here to see the next milestone?</div><div style="text-align: center;"><br></div><div style="text-align: left;">365 days. 365 opportunities to change my life for the better and to touch the lives of others. 365 chances to make <i>that </i>day, the <i>best</i> day. 365 days to LIVE. </div><div style="text-align: left;"><br></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b>I can't take that for granted for one single solitary second.</b></div><div><br></div><div>The last year has rocked my world. I never would have expected this to happen. But now that cancer is in the rear view mirror, I can see how my life's events have lead me to this moment. And great things are ahead for me. After a few more trips around the sun...</div><div><br></div><div><img id="id_82cc_4a0f_ae26_f460" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjSXSkKUQmH7K2QnVVeT_FhUuggb7giE3X0dtaBLaxdqbkzgfOjCqagXVYraqYxBgv2R5worT3RnePe4vMLFk4-a9JGa1H-xucJorek8EfiYYQYw1XB2lDdQEhHfy4FrHaCwk0cMETiwl4/s5000/%255BUNSET%255D" alt="" title="" tooltip="" style="width: 392px; height: auto;"><br><br></div><div><br></div>Lindsayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01769555972790205358noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8502919743303964197.post-28914946701259611842017-02-20T08:44:00.000-06:002017-02-20T08:44:19.357-06:00Hello...it's me...<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Well hello everyone! It's been a while but I'm here and I've got great news to share, as well as a summary of how surgery went. I'm approaching 1 month out and feeling pretty good, on days when I push too hard I definitely feel it and pay for it later, but I started "exercising" last week (long walk) and picked up Evelyn for the first time this weekend. So progress is coming, slowly.<br />
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The first two weeks following surgery were all a bit of a blur #blameitonthenorco. The first two days were pretty awful and had me regretting doing the hysterectomy at the same time as the mastectomy. I really only had use of my legs, so getting in and out of bed was pretty darn difficult. In addition, I had trapped air under my diaphragm which caused some pretty significant pain. But once I got rid of the gas, the recovery from the hyster was pretty smooth. Now I can say that I am happy I don't have ANOTHER surgery to recover from! Here's a few pictures from the last couple weeks...<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEixA_X3aJlKuj3tThCVgo7IkzNzLB9BWc4syh-acOQMXmqWnIRbelHTiaMIIcv4qNYWI8N80SpJHKC2mo5r6J4sVHQNJQtQpV7cgKknpHjKaxAm2kgr6obXQyEf_nB3eMnq03qQ4mYm_Lk/s1600/20170123_215354.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEixA_X3aJlKuj3tThCVgo7IkzNzLB9BWc4syh-acOQMXmqWnIRbelHTiaMIIcv4qNYWI8N80SpJHKC2mo5r6J4sVHQNJQtQpV7cgKknpHjKaxAm2kgr6obXQyEf_nB3eMnq03qQ4mYm_Lk/s320/20170123_215354.jpg" width="240" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">The night of surgery, it took 8.5 hours!! This was before the gas pain kicked in so I'm still smiling.</td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhX4wdpwfgD5QmWZr4cvZI4PP-7mkwyxmdrtQA2oqZJpc4NHS_KGMqX34tiV_6_hcrBZKDqn2WbzhdDrSbTtLA0m709IUjwm7gNUejf5S-sWnqu9YiVrwE0dCTjhBzdDep8u40SB7CgZq4/s1600/20170124_181912.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhX4wdpwfgD5QmWZr4cvZI4PP-7mkwyxmdrtQA2oqZJpc4NHS_KGMqX34tiV_6_hcrBZKDqn2WbzhdDrSbTtLA0m709IUjwm7gNUejf5S-sWnqu9YiVrwE0dCTjhBzdDep8u40SB7CgZq4/s320/20170124_181912.jpg" width="240" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Kate made me a get well soon card at school. That's her name along the bottom (the p is really a backwards a). The best gift I received! That orange guy? That's mommy with "boy hair"</td></tr>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Day 3 of recovery, so happy to be home! I didn't leave this recliner for a solid week, laying flat was a big challenge</td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhTily-OvaEuFMDjj3m711BAGbX3ILlH292HYN0M4jzih7U8qYDD2nwnmYSkEAwavy2L3CNZ_4J83r8uzeC2bbFkuqlxVNlD9cmYGGymLWHhO91Kh5mh0IPt_eIyg3j-bKNUGpWbU9c0WI/s1600/20170126_185221.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhTily-OvaEuFMDjj3m711BAGbX3ILlH292HYN0M4jzih7U8qYDD2nwnmYSkEAwavy2L3CNZ_4J83r8uzeC2bbFkuqlxVNlD9cmYGGymLWHhO91Kh5mh0IPt_eIyg3j-bKNUGpWbU9c0WI/s320/20170126_185221.jpg" width="240" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">This girl wanted mommy snuggles so badly, we finally snuggled on day 3, with the help of a mastectomy pillow. My heart was complete at this moment!</td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEipMR-WeLX5seXrwwUyzY8yBpGxiaU4bm1qIxXjEn_OYscrpaBlIH0VusRtT4i6dZ2qRM1crUvF53mqV3iT-BE_pJmJZenhJbryMvVy7ivUtD6ibYPGAZHvmo5A0LR_HgJSLXZPHdw6qr0/s320/20170204_105744.jpg" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;" width="240" /></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">11 days post surgery, I could tolerate sitting with her without the pillow, though it was tender. Still had my drains in at this point, which was awful, I would get them out on day 14.</td></tr>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">13 days post surgery and SUPERBOWL! Kate had a jam packed weekend and fell asleep on my lap (which never happens) so I enjoyed my snuggles with her too. The new boobies make nice pillows!</td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj-h3sJ8uf039AftRz73O6MeBtpXoE1u-VHuFJNKLKFy2QA31Yh14pp0h1jJAYdctafKOEY3Hi_QKadssDVYoj-L5voO2EU0Ez7cQFngPAas3JSvrzkiIV20TPWsibfXrlp1W2cJymfWjk/s1600/20170209_191312.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj-h3sJ8uf039AftRz73O6MeBtpXoE1u-VHuFJNKLKFy2QA31Yh14pp0h1jJAYdctafKOEY3Hi_QKadssDVYoj-L5voO2EU0Ez7cQFngPAas3JSvrzkiIV20TPWsibfXrlp1W2cJymfWjk/s320/20170209_191312.jpg" width="240" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Silly faces with Evelyn on day 17</td></tr>
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Non-surgery related, my hair is coming back in STRONG! I have reached milestone #1, which is enough hair to NOT see my scalp underneath. Not quite ready for a haircut just yet, but its coming along nicely. My eyebrows are also coming back in, thank goodness, because I am so tired of drawing them on. The eyelashes are pulling up the rear, coming in slow. I'll be so happy when they are back in, eyelashes are functional as well as fashionable!</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgAX0QflaHwtvS2sQMj6J83nmoGeOtoXkl1eftwOyZxGH_-iIc9wEUPPKYiZ0zPbwl7O9EaH0q6FRcsLf0GAfdDlmCj4VCB1CTXIsCkawrhLy0gpMLAXorqADRdD5nKrwsujhvPJ3nEtAo/s1600/20170216_094454.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgAX0QflaHwtvS2sQMj6J83nmoGeOtoXkl1eftwOyZxGH_-iIc9wEUPPKYiZ0zPbwl7O9EaH0q6FRcsLf0GAfdDlmCj4VCB1CTXIsCkawrhLy0gpMLAXorqADRdD5nKrwsujhvPJ3nEtAo/s320/20170216_094454.jpg" width="240" /></a></div>
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Now, what does the future hold for me? Some pretty great stuff apparently. I had my first "survivorship" appointment with my oncologist and we talked pathology and recurrence rates. When they did my surgery, they sent all the tissue they removed (breast tissue and lymph nodes) to pathology to look for any residual cancer cells. And guess what?!?! IT WAS ALL NEGATIVE!</div>
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OH YEAH!! That news called for a celebration. All your prayers worked my friends, you all helped me get to this point! It's called a complete pathological response (cPR) to chemo and it carries with it the best prognosis possible with my diagnosis. </div>
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So this is what I'm fighting the next few years. Because I had triple negative cancer (very aggressive and can be difficult to treat) my greatest risk of recurrence is in the next 3-5 years. BUT, because I had a cPR, that risk is only about 10%. If I can make it beyond 5 years, research shows my risk of recurrence is nearly zero, for some reason triple negative cancers don't seem to return past the 5 year mark. So I just have to make it to 2022 and I'm in the clear!</div>
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This whole cancer journey is such a mindbender. I have gone through a total range of emotions, from feeling like I am totally going to beat this and its just a bump in the road, to feeling like I have a death sentence and I won't see my girls grow up or get old with Mitch. Now that I'm on the other side, its time to start balancing these emotions. </div>
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While I'm aware of my chance of recurrence, I'm not going to let that paralyze me. I'm going to take better care of myself (my body has been through the ringer the last 6 months!!) and my family. Take the time to play with my girls, take pictures and videos to remember this time and go on dates with Mitch. And I hope to give back somehow to my new community of women as well, be of help to other young women fighting this same battle.</div>
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What I do know is I am not the same. I will not get the pre-cancer Lindsay back, but that's ok. Because this Lindsay is a total bad ass! She beat cancer and isn't looking back,</div>
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Lindsayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01769555972790205358noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8502919743303964197.post-10655293633353234212017-01-21T21:20:00.002-06:002017-01-21T21:34:32.266-06:00Pre-opWell, the day has finally arrived. The odd thing is, I have been preparing for this day since before I knew I had cancer, yet I feel more unprepared than ever, if you can believe that.<br />
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As many of you may remember, I was planning a prophylactic bilateral mastectomy with total hysterectomy when I discovered I was BRCA2+ in January of last year. Now, a year later, almost to the day, with a cancer diagnosis thrown into the mix, I am actually going through with the mother of all surgeries.<br />
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A lot of you have asked what my surgery will be like, if I will have reconstruction, if I am still getting the hysterectomy now that I have the big C, etc, so I thought I would devote an entire post to going through it step by step.<br />
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Disclaimer: I will be using terms like "nipple" and "breast" and maybe even "vagina", so if those words make you squeamish 1. grow up and 2. this post may not be for you. If you are hoping for pictures of real boobs, you will be out of luck. Move along son.<br />
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Now that the legalities are out of the way, lets get on with it....<br />
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<u>Day before day of surgery (Sunday)</u><br />
This day may actually be worse than surgery day. I have to report to the hospital bright and early (0730) and check in to receive a radioactive shot right to the nipple. POW.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhKeRz027oWsToJZpWsbwCFCX6Wfd0HYci1r6Jw_Aq7scvTA_qUDkqiAOal89Th3WHbD_kWN_PQoW_A8p5JaaYYK3lDF_ty3O5Kf75qXXmPZETd0pmOU_8RHPR76kwnnlSg_lH9Ai0oypI/s1600/pow2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="272" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhKeRz027oWsToJZpWsbwCFCX6Wfd0HYci1r6Jw_Aq7scvTA_qUDkqiAOal89Th3WHbD_kWN_PQoW_A8p5JaaYYK3lDF_ty3O5Kf75qXXmPZETd0pmOU_8RHPR76kwnnlSg_lH9Ai0oypI/s320/pow2.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
Let me explain. Because I had cancer, I also earned an sentinel node dissection, which requires my breast surgeon to remove 1-3 lymph nodes to test for cancer cells. She doesn't want just any lymph nodes in my armpit, she wants the first and BEST lymph nodes in my armpit.<br />
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I'll bore you the anatomy lesson, but lymph nodes are responsible for draining fluid around your body. They work together in a group, much like a gang. The sentinel node is the queen bee, or the leader that drives the chain of nodes. My surgeon is on the hunt for her and her closest cronies, because if they are cancer free, it is safe to assume the others are as well.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh73Be2oDX013PNHNqVzZtxbVeeYuortpwDkLn-CJMLrYNpxziMG9syQqpTLSuw7swGbOEKARWjZHxhnCDb_qyJT6ISX5i1SUtHwsrJ2BmiCzZFS7hgvos3X-FAmwcRmb0YUNqgc4D_6RY/s1600/nodes.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh73Be2oDX013PNHNqVzZtxbVeeYuortpwDkLn-CJMLrYNpxziMG9syQqpTLSuw7swGbOEKARWjZHxhnCDb_qyJT6ISX5i1SUtHwsrJ2BmiCzZFS7hgvos3X-FAmwcRmb0YUNqgc4D_6RY/s320/nodes.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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In order to determine which node is the leader of the pack, a radiologist has to inject radioactive dye into my breast and that dye drains out of the area through the lymph system. As it leaves the breast area, it concentrates the most in the first node of the chain, then lesser so in those nodes following until it is no longer detected in the nodes at the end of the chain.<br />
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So in case you missed it, I will repeat for emphasis. "a radiologist has to INJECT radioactive dye INTO MY BREAST." This means nipple meets needle, FOUR.TIMES. Tomorrow morning I will be injected at 12, 3, 6, and 9 o'clock around my nipple, just to make sure enough dye gets in to make it glow like a glowstick*.<br />
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<span style="font-size: xx-small;">*I am told it is actually a very low dose of radioactivity. It does make me feel a little bad ass though to say I'm <i>radioactive</i>.</span><br />
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Then the following day, my breast surgeon will scan me to find the most radioactive nodes and promptly take those suckers out. More about that later in this post.<br />
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So after my super awesome morning wakeup call, I then get to come home and begin my bowel prep for surgery. I start out with an appetizer of magnesium citrate, or a very effective saline laxative, followed by a full day of only clear liquids, which means oreos are off the menu. What is on the menu is a variety of gatorade, water, soup broth and jello. I know you are all so jealous, you can hardly contain yourselves. This treatment is prescribed to ensure I am <i>cleaned out </i>prior to surgery.<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgWokRGfiEn1TDcKNCLk0Y59FPJ8xE5cpwkvIgCed-c9qVvrYZo1js19BiKa2JVg1rJQeY1bVHZyzPENqGoY972vc2AyZQ_Hcat-ChS1aor30HaZabVApbVkl4XvTARdrVxSuPSIaOME3Q/s1600/clear+tray.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="262" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgWokRGfiEn1TDcKNCLk0Y59FPJ8xE5cpwkvIgCed-c9qVvrYZo1js19BiKa2JVg1rJQeY1bVHZyzPENqGoY972vc2AyZQ_Hcat-ChS1aor30HaZabVApbVkl4XvTARdrVxSuPSIaOME3Q/s320/clear+tray.png" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Clear liquids, with a side of poop emoji. My kind of Sunday.</td></tr>
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I will end my night with a massage (courtesy of a fellow survivor, shout out to Jen!) and some positive self talk in addition to a whole lot of prayers and likely some xanax.<br />
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<u>Day of Surgery (Monday)</u><br />
Now that I am prepped physically, although maybe not emotionally, I will head to the hospital just after 5 am to check in for surgery. I'll get an IV, sign a crap ton of papers and have my last moments with the breasts that fed both of my babies for almost 2 years combined and the uterus that provided them with a comfortable home. Mentally, I want to go into surgery with a positive attitude, so I plan on listening to some dance music and staying up beat. If that doesn't work, watching George Dubya put on a poncho just might do the trick. They will walk me back to surgery around 0700.<br />
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<b>Surgery 1- Robotic total hysterectomy (removal of uterus, tubes, ovaries and cervix)</b><br />
After I am good and asleep (and airway secured!), we will begin with my hysterectomy. After making one abdominal incision, my Gyn doctor uses a robot, as an extension of his arms, to remove all the parts listed above.<br />
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That's right, a robot is taking out my uterus. Maybe that would be a good suggestion for a future FRC challenge?? Perhaps not...<br />
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This will take approximately 1-1.5 hours to complete, and then my Gyn surgeon will hand off to my breast surgeon.<br />
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<b>Surgery 2- Sentinel lymph node dissection (taking out the queen bee and her posse) </b><br />
This is where the previous day's procedure is important. While the picture below isn't entirely accurate (I said peace out to my tumor a while ago courtesy of adriamycin, cytoxan and taxol), it gives you the idea of the procedure. Using a probe, my surgeon will identify those nodes that glow the brightest in the chain and promptly take them out and send them to pathology. She will then proceed with my mastectomy and wait for the preliminary pathology to return before my procedure is over. I'm not sure how long this part of the procedure takes, I'm guessing around an hour or less.<br />
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<b>Surgery 3- Nipple sparing, skin sparing bilateral mastectomy (bye bye boobs)</b></div>
Now the serious work begins. My breast surgeon will make an incision in my "inframammary folds" (greek lesson- infra = below, mammary = boobs) and begin removing breast tissue under my skin. She will remove every ounce of tissue she can find from my ribs up to my collarbone and over to my armpit. All of this tissue will be sent off to pathology and scrutinized for cancer with the hopes of an all clear at the final report. Removing all this tissue will take approximately 3-4 hours and at that time, the preliminary pathology report should be back on my nodes. If there is concern for more cancer in the nodes, then my breast surgeon will remove more.<br />
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<b>Surgery 4- Direct to implant, over the muscle breast reconstruction (hello new boobs!)</b><br />
My breast surgeon has now earned her lunch, and she will tap out and allow my plastic surgeon to finish the job. I want to mention that many plastic surgeons all over the country chose to do reconstruction differently. The most common method is to create a pocket beneath the pec muscle to hold an eventual implant. Because this pocket does not naturally exist, expanders are put into place to stretch that pocket gradually until it is large enough to hold an implant.. This means slow, painful fills to stretch that muscle, in addition to muscle spasms and an additional surgery to swap them out for implants. While this technique is not wrong and may actually be preferred in some cases, my surgeon prefers to do it a bit differently.<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg-8HFIv6kqd_bZNSn06yR_xRGPOFow3YLJIAY5WLK659Cc-DDrG4Rr1-2xabBow-4pdoFyX0we3F7F-oAiC0Svkd-onBF4nXtVcXN4MJhbuH_QwvOyW3sEAgNYEbWSqVqcMFzPWIUZMsE/s1600/breast-implant-surgery.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="182" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg-8HFIv6kqd_bZNSn06yR_xRGPOFow3YLJIAY5WLK659Cc-DDrG4Rr1-2xabBow-4pdoFyX0we3F7F-oAiC0Svkd-onBF4nXtVcXN4MJhbuH_QwvOyW3sEAgNYEbWSqVqcMFzPWIUZMsE/s400/breast-implant-surgery.png" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">This is the best image I could find to describe the two options,, just ignore the mammary gland in the photo, mine will be removed</td></tr>
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My breast surgeon prefers to do over the muscle implants, where he creates a pocket with collagen sheets, almost like an internal bra to hold the implant in place. The down side to this is that there is very little tissue between the implant and the skin, so sometimes you can see rippling under the skin, but I can have everything done in one surgery instead of two and I can avoid some of the complications with under the muscle implants. This portion of the surgery will take approximately 1.5 hours.<br />
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Whew, I'm tired just writing this all out and I have to go through it all physically in about 36 hours. My entire surgery should last around 7 hours, although to me it will just feel like a really long nap! I hope this post helped explained a little bit of what Monday will look like for me. I hope to blog more frequently while I am off and I will do my best to update Monday night once I am somewhat coherent. <br />
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Prayers are always welcome, specifically for clear minds and steady hands for my surgeons, healing for my body and absence of infection in the days to come. I would also welcome prayers for Mitch and the girls, that they can adjust to me being less available for a while and that Mitch has peace while I am in surgery.<br />
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Thank you to ALL of you for your support and love, I couldn't have gone through all of this without you. Much love, ~LindsLindsayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01769555972790205358noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8502919743303964197.post-89315290611164014972017-01-14T09:56:00.000-06:002017-01-14T09:56:56.944-06:00Graduation DayHi internet! I promise I haven't forgotten you, I've been very busy since my last post over 2 months ago (seriously, how is it possible it has been that long!!). I've:<br />
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-completed all 12 rounds of Taxol and officially am DONE-ZO with CHEMO!!<br />
-worked pretty much full time during chemo, including finishing almost 70 performance reviews<br />
-got sick 3x since Thanksgiving with head cold/cough, courtesy of the cutest little germ buckets in Peoria aka Kate and Evelyn<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEitJTq0XNnUEK1_YFOFbKoK7exhcvi5dPOSzBJIDmryzSB5fsZR4Lk9gNCDI5jUBUs4XuaabG2ZvUJGYwpcojXkpWuxM5f2Y8nUWbk4s1eBt2pbLjDdgueyUyMLn96Lsi99B2ReK5NSY_Y/s1600/20161115_055041.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEitJTq0XNnUEK1_YFOFbKoK7exhcvi5dPOSzBJIDmryzSB5fsZR4Lk9gNCDI5jUBUs4XuaabG2ZvUJGYwpcojXkpWuxM5f2Y8nUWbk4s1eBt2pbLjDdgueyUyMLn96Lsi99B2ReK5NSY_Y/s320/20161115_055041.jpg" width="240" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">This is what bedsharing looks like in our house, there is no SHARING.</td></tr>
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-still managed to get Christmas cards out on time (It's a Christmas miracle!)<br />
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-started growing some hair back!</div>
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- Been to all my pre-op appointments in preparation for my upcoming surgery on Jan 23rd. All my doctors are happy with my progress through chemo and feel I am ready to take on this next step.<br />
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-Kicked off robot season with Mitch, this year they have to build a robot that shoots wiffle balls into a funnel (simple way to describe it) and carry gears to a peg in the middle of the field. At the end of the game, the robot has to climb a rope for extra points. The animation below will give you a much better description!<br />
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<iframe width="320" height="266" class="YOUTUBE-iframe-video" data-thumbnail-src="https://i.ytimg.com/vi/EMiNmJW7enI/0.jpg" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/EMiNmJW7enI?feature=player_embedded" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe></div>
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Describing my surgery will be another post entirely, as it is too much detail to put in this one (plus Evelyn is currently trying to close my computer as I type. These children of ours make finding time to blog nearly impossible!)<br />
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I am now off work until after the surgery, so I am hoping I will have more time to blog. I really do miss it and I know all of you miss reading and knowing what is going on with our little family. So hopefully there will be more posts to come!<br />
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In preparation for surgery, I am going to open the meal train back up for the few weeks after surgery when I will be reduced to a live human T-rex (I will have limited range of motion in my arms for a while) so the link is below if any of you readers are interested in making sure my kids and husband don't have to live on cereal.<br />
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<a href="https://www.mealtrain.com/trains/rv135d" target="_blank">Meal Train, choo choo!</a></div>
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Ok, gotta run, Kate just threw a baby crib at Evelyn's head...Lindsayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01769555972790205358noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8502919743303964197.post-86918809076576306102016-11-06T11:42:00.002-06:002016-11-06T11:42:28.149-06:00Something to celebrateI had this post planned a few days ago with the intention of writing it while at chemo (which I did start writing on Thursday, but I'm finishing it on Sunday) not realizing it would be the morning after a historic game 7 and a fairy tale win for the Cubs. So the beginning of this post is celebrating an amazing win and a dream realized for hundreds of thousands of people. Go Cubs Go.<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi8jT7W49JABAWsiPOhT0DEORnop9ALZsfIMC6fNeCTdBjW1sTvKi4FQj8uwkwbDHKLmU9tHzfRVZU9_YqEeHu2EtIHNki9oGmQC7imhFemRasoREnMRq6xrsPLb4BypBaYf55M1WP4x64/s1600/20161103_001733.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi8jT7W49JABAWsiPOhT0DEORnop9ALZsfIMC6fNeCTdBjW1sTvKi4FQj8uwkwbDHKLmU9tHzfRVZU9_YqEeHu2EtIHNki9oGmQC7imhFemRasoREnMRq6xrsPLb4BypBaYf55M1WP4x64/s400/20161103_001733.jpg" width="300" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Staying up to watch the game, sis couldn't stay awake any longer...</td></tr>
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My real reason for writing, and celebrating, is I was able to get a mammogram and ultrasound on Monday to investigate some changes I had felt in my left breast recently. In doing so, they were able to evaluate the status of my original tumor, in addition to looking for any new growth that may have popped up since. I am happy to report that <br />
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1. I have no new tumor growth and <br />
2. My original tumor is GONE. <br />
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Let me say that one more time so it can sink in, I have no tumor left in my body. Gone. Absent. Nada.<br />
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I am just flabbergasted and excited and hopeful and emotional and #allthefeels. Knowing that what I have been putting myself and my family through for the last 13 weeks has been worth it. Technically I am cancer free and that feels GOOD. Now we just need to get through 7 more rounds of chemo, then surgery and then getting back to normal life. Or at least a new normal.<br />
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Which brings me to the real reason for this post, let's celebrate!!! My amazing work peeps hosted a vendor party/fundraiser for me Friday night and it was the most amazing and overwhelming experience I have had in a long time. So many people came together to support me and our family and there are truly no words to express how I felt that night. <br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjIJkuWqUGfIg3WKLDADIGrwyzpGApAMoPVOUUjGPlP8tjBcgmelvb-jyOo1UpdudOqGdKgZ1lsXHLLTvfpONL_dA64Ny9rGLb4O593suF8FRA8FPtGGNOqVH0r5h3NYedlh881B4IHdHQ/s1600/group+photo.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="273" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjIJkuWqUGfIg3WKLDADIGrwyzpGApAMoPVOUUjGPlP8tjBcgmelvb-jyOo1UpdudOqGdKgZ1lsXHLLTvfpONL_dA64Ny9rGLb4O593suF8FRA8FPtGGNOqVH0r5h3NYedlh881B4IHdHQ/s400/group+photo.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
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There were so many amazing women (and men!) that were in attendance selling their products. Many of the consultants donated their time (and some even their commission) to our family to help us through this tough time. That in itself is amazing. What is even better is they have some really great products they are selling just in time for the holidays and the party is still open!<br />
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Since many of you are not local to me, I thought I would post links to the different vendors on here so that many of you are able to shop their products, even from home. So if you are interested in ordering anything from the following vendors, you should be able to order online and have it shipped to your house. Clicking on the link to each vendor should take you to their page to start shopping!<br />
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<a href="https://www.mythirtyone.com/1860687/shop/Party/EventDetail/9501727" target="_blank"><span style="font-size: large;">Thirty-one</span></a><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhYPF95nReIuYtPkNYtKSTxPW5teD-ZreSx17_i-GCK6CZTK8LU_uT1HQyssipTohyphenhyphen_XZtH5Sx_F-TFoG8nlANZKYaXtlv2aUklbPpvUhvErt3ZF49LPmNWjJY6tsaKQ_YdOx6TzMQiqBQ/s1600/31.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhYPF95nReIuYtPkNYtKSTxPW5teD-ZreSx17_i-GCK6CZTK8LU_uT1HQyssipTohyphenhyphen_XZtH5Sx_F-TFoG8nlANZKYaXtlv2aUklbPpvUhvErt3ZF49LPmNWjJY6tsaKQ_YdOx6TzMQiqBQ/s400/31.jpg" width="316" /></a></div>
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Thirty one is a great company that sells a large variety of bags, storage items and personalized gifts. I have a few of their products and swear by them! The deluxe utility tote is great for Costco runs and both girls have cinch bags for daycare necessities. They also have great thermal products that help transport hot or cold items to parties--perfect for the upcoming holiday season.<br />
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<a href="http://www.beautycounter.com/kristinburns" target="_blank"><span style="font-size: large;">Beauty Counter</span></a><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiSYIzknrec25OHeKsI8JHSTp2_ySW7Qr24L3AIxKII37quzWcoGI-ESBQw36Ta-F4050wqjQyAk1LnFusPCN2wu6M2g89VNytj53iOFCG5_awKygvVVj4gXgEBAy4qXkAOBHA5gzgsj7M/s1600/beauty+counter.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="246" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiSYIzknrec25OHeKsI8JHSTp2_ySW7Qr24L3AIxKII37quzWcoGI-ESBQw36Ta-F4050wqjQyAk1LnFusPCN2wu6M2g89VNytj53iOFCG5_awKygvVVj4gXgEBAy4qXkAOBHA5gzgsj7M/s320/beauty+counter.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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Beauty counter is a company that has developed beauty products that are free from the multiple toxins and chemicals that are laced in all our cosmetic items. I have recently started using their products and I love them. If you read my <a href="http://fearnothingriskeverything.blogspot.com/2016/07/positive-or-negative.html" target="_blank">positive or negative</a> post, you know that some breast cancers grow in the presence of estrogen and/or progesterone. Unfortunately, there are many chemicals in lotions/cleansers/hair care products that mimic estrogen in the body (if you have heard of parabens, they are one of these compounds). Beauty counter is dedicated to making safe products free of all of these chemicals, which is so important to me during this journey. While I haven't eliminated all of my cosmetics with these compounds, I have switched moisterizers, face cleanser and body wash to beauty counter products. <br />
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<a href="https://randijam.jamberry.com/us/en/shop/profile" target="_blank"><span style="font-size: large;">Jamberry</span></a><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjnpoviMMbRY1w6df5tuig3mr1LWbKxp8L6zFP-gOUNtwlGKoiq_aP1B3ESZHG8e2IhPidxmsguLmchT0brEtVW9qv6tLqb2LA9K4V0taRgLag26GhsrRUX6GcjBhQ-J8ed6eZsSJa8yEw/s1600/jamberry.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="247" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjnpoviMMbRY1w6df5tuig3mr1LWbKxp8L6zFP-gOUNtwlGKoiq_aP1B3ESZHG8e2IhPidxmsguLmchT0brEtVW9qv6tLqb2LA9K4V0taRgLag26GhsrRUX6GcjBhQ-J8ed6eZsSJa8yEw/s320/jamberry.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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Jamberry is the company responsible for the cute nail wraps you have seen all over facebook. While I can't use nail wraps when I'm on chemo (total bummer, there are so many cute patterns!) they also sell regular and gel polish. Jamberry is also trying to eliminate toxic chemicals in their products, making their polishes "5 free".<br />
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<a href="http://www.melaniebenedict.mymonat.com/" target="_blank"><span style="font-size: large;">Monat Hair Care</span></a><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjMbv4cAPZumF1151CQd8qROJM43gNpKf699TdlSAYZs2AXGcTsFW9Dp8-PzY-Rupj0qk5t9kWtJDgfduWfn2fZaz20TSPUNXJ6DBcDg9R6ziCbNt4FpLrdebH3_1FvSEJHvhLm_Gszp_Q/s1600/Monat.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="160" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjMbv4cAPZumF1151CQd8qROJM43gNpKf699TdlSAYZs2AXGcTsFW9Dp8-PzY-Rupj0qk5t9kWtJDgfduWfn2fZaz20TSPUNXJ6DBcDg9R6ziCbNt4FpLrdebH3_1FvSEJHvhLm_Gszp_Q/s320/Monat.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
While I don't really need to worry too much about hair care right now, I did learn a lot from Melanie and came home with some products to help promote healthy hair growth. Monat, like many of the companies I have already mentioned, specializes in improving the health of your hair and scalp by using sustainable, natural products. <br />
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<a href="https://www.pamperedchef.com/pws/brittanycashdollar/guest-landing/9015531289755" target="_blank"><span style="font-size: large;">Pampered Chef</span></a><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg_EtAhR5yrXiFRJQvMfOhUOdrkML7eGJrOF6IoU3ohq33ABv_qzCf7f350rOSk88qmmNSHbCROIkLhvlx_KHrXwJUEUJJSyfqE_iMnpFp0bKxW1nSc0FwAv-QpSQXrr_snMZG3yx28KR0/s1600/popcorn.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg_EtAhR5yrXiFRJQvMfOhUOdrkML7eGJrOF6IoU3ohq33ABv_qzCf7f350rOSk88qmmNSHbCROIkLhvlx_KHrXwJUEUJJSyfqE_iMnpFp0bKxW1nSc0FwAv-QpSQXrr_snMZG3yx28KR0/s320/popcorn.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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This popcorn popper was the hit of the party! All you have to do is use the red stopper to measure your popcorn kernels, dump them in the bowl and pop it in the microwave and you have yummy microwave popcorn without all the oil and chemicals. I can't wait to use it with Kate! This one just one of the awesome items Brittany had available.</div>
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<a href="https://alliriessen.scentsy.us/?partyId=317053109" target="_blank"><span style="font-size: large;">Scentsy</span></a></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEghXwuIOzKj8gX4C0uesiy0j6GQUXHDqaeU4Fitn5Owe25GuExH8gIZi8GgHBrgqV7Z1PiF8OQM8fDLUdJ6MW98-12s53fygE66umjdrzNsi0LWf1KrpXsL7VMdhozDsNCFntkitgNNYas/s1600/scentsy.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="245" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEghXwuIOzKj8gX4C0uesiy0j6GQUXHDqaeU4Fitn5Owe25GuExH8gIZi8GgHBrgqV7Z1PiF8OQM8fDLUdJ6MW98-12s53fygE66umjdrzNsi0LWf1KrpXsL7VMdhozDsNCFntkitgNNYas/s320/scentsy.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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There is something about the smell of cloves and cinnamon around the holidays that just make our house feel cozy. Scentsy has so many yummy holiday scents and warmers, they are great for gifts or to jazz up your holiday decorations. They are also a great price for holiday gift exchanges!</div>
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<a href="http://www.stelladot.com/ts/8sll6" target="_blank"><span style="font-size: large;">Stella and Dot</span></a><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg2beeAWwfcsg0dRneu-6wkITrom5tC3_tjS7mH6HO5FPFP08eNBGuT2m2rSEupRbd0wQswlW5HPWNNq7GBKlwe-bQluUmVdxGlxeb1A8ybANbFtqW-eZJiaVDO_lNXEbV3ePEBgWmNLwA/s1600/stella+and+dot.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="238" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg2beeAWwfcsg0dRneu-6wkITrom5tC3_tjS7mH6HO5FPFP08eNBGuT2m2rSEupRbd0wQswlW5HPWNNq7GBKlwe-bQluUmVdxGlxeb1A8ybANbFtqW-eZJiaVDO_lNXEbV3ePEBgWmNLwA/s320/stella+and+dot.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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Chelsea was a busy lady at the party Friday night as well, her jewelry and accessories were very popular! Stella and Dot has something for everyone, no matter your style. I love both the delicate engravable bar necklace and the chunkier cuff bracelets. Maybe some bold earrings would go well with my bald look!</div>
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<a href="https://r5610.myubam.com/" target="_blank"><span style="font-size: large;">Usborne books</span></a><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjtrR8zuCMgXL-VbLn2QDAuM4x83iiDnROBzfwPR0BoKwLIcdCZqfGplbtFubYGWUVBvvE1ou5oGESZx_1fkDglyeTYLePzpolNsRB_2qdQP-vPCXq0xsv0WNjCVACe3WhA3tMwqARbJr0/s1600/usborne.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="280" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjtrR8zuCMgXL-VbLn2QDAuM4x83iiDnROBzfwPR0BoKwLIcdCZqfGplbtFubYGWUVBvvE1ou5oGESZx_1fkDglyeTYLePzpolNsRB_2qdQP-vPCXq0xsv0WNjCVACe3WhA3tMwqARbJr0/s320/usborne.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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Usborne has the MOST creative and inspiring books for kids. While we read to the girls often, it has been exciting to see Kate really start to enjoy "reading" books by herself. I love the idea of opening a book every night before Christmas instead of spending money on more toys the girls don't need. Click the link to get some books for your little ones!</div>
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Also a big thank you to Erin from <a href="http://www.epuent.myrandf.com/" target="_blank">Rodan and Fields</a> and Charissa from <a href="https://www.facebook.com/groups/LuLaRoeByCharissaSummerDuPage/" target="_blank">Lularoe</a> for partying with us!</div>
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****Disclaimer, if you are easily annoyed by all of this advertising, don't worry, I will be back to my (semi)regularly scheduled programming on my next post. I wanted to give each of these ladies time on my blog because they GRACIOUSLY donated their time to support me. And what a great way to get some holiday shopping done early!!</div>
<br />Lindsayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01769555972790205358noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8502919743303964197.post-52344827068592064772016-10-15T16:51:00.000-05:002016-10-15T16:51:20.825-05:00Reality Bites.Does anyone remember this movie? It doesn't get more nineties than Jeanine Garofolo and Winona Ryder and while this post will not be about the angst of 20 somethings in Houston, it's title is awful fitting for MY reality right about now.<br />
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Let me preface this by saying, this is not another pity party post. I am actually feeling pretty positive lately, given that I have reached the chemo summit and am now slowly inching my way down, one base camp at a time. While I still have 10 more rounds of Taxol before my mountain is conquered, in total I was prescribed 20 weeks of treatment and this was week 10. So take that Everest, I'm coming back down.</div>
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Anyway, back to reality (ha, you get it?). I came to the realization today that receiving a cancer diagnosis drastically changes reality in many ways. My perspective on a lot of things has changed and I am reaching, searching, grasping for a new normal in the midst of some rather uncertain times. So come along for the ride and let me give you a glimpse into my new reality, in no particular order.<br />
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<i>Chemo brain: It's like pregnancy brain without the baby. </i><br />
Chemo brain is a real phenomenon my friends and unfortunately, I'm afflicted with it. Main symptoms are aphasia, or inability to find the right word(s), memory loss, difficulty concentrating and loss of attention to detail. I have found the aphasia the most common for me, often times I feel like I'm on $10,000 pyramid, trying to describe the word I'm looking for.<br />
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I also have experienced some of these things prior to my diagnosis so I can't blame them all on the chemo, but this week I took the wrong exit on the way from the cancer center to daycare to pick up the girls. I was rocking some serious car karaoke to Justin Timberlake at the time, but #blameitonthechemo.</div>
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<i>Low blood counts: Children are walking petri dishes</i></div>
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I have blood drawn from my port before every treatment to ensure my blood counts aren't too low before I'm allowed to have chemo. While I was receiving AC chemo (the nasty red stuff), my counts were amazingly resilient, in part because I received a shot the day after chemo to boost my white blood cells.</div>
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Taxol does not have nearly the effect on my counts so imagine my surprise when the nurse tells me my white count was 2,000 (normal range is 4,000-10,000) but because my differential (or the percentages of the types of white cells I have) was promising, I was give the go-ahead for another round of Taxol.</div>
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What this means is I am at an increased risk of infection, which is super neat for a few reasons:</div>
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1. We are entering cold and flu season </div>
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2. I work in a hospital, where sick people go to get better </div>
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3. We have two small children in daycare 50 hours a week</div>
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I'm not sure I could put myself at any more risk, unless I do something silly, like <a href="http://fearnothingriskeverything.blogspot.com/2016/08/infectious-disease.html" target="_blank">go to a children's museum</a>. Here's hoping that my low counts are a fluke and will get their act together before next week's treatment. In the meantime, I will be covering myself in sanitizer.</div>
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<i>Hot flashes: Because there is nothing sexier than a sweaty bald lady</i></div>
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I started experiencing hot flashes in my first round of chemo and they have stuck around this entire 10 weeks. Initially they were mostly night sweats, causing me to wake up both hot and cold at the same time (not really sure how this is possible, but its true!). Now I get them periodically throughout the day as well, although they are still more common while sleeping.</div>
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I am not sure if the hot flashes are from chemically induced menopause (that just brought the mood down in the room real quick) or simply a side effect from the chemo. Regardless of origin, they are an annoying, but tolerable side effect and unfortunately, part of my new reality.</div>
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<i>Superman vs Clark Kent: Breast cancer and my mild mannered alter ego</i></div>
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This is the one I am struggling with the most at the moment. I got cancer and that sucks. My prognosis is good, my side effects have been manageable and I can no longer feel my tumor, which everyone tells me is a good thing and a sign that the chemo is working. All of these things are GREAT news, but it is creating this imbalance for me mentally because by all appearances, not that much has changed. </div>
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I am working nearly full time, although less hours than what I was doing prior to my diagnosis. I am still a wife and mother, responsible for caring for our kids, maintaining a household, and supporting my husband. Now that we have gotten over the hump of AC, its like life has returned to normal. Yet its not normal. </div>
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My new reality is that it will be years before my hair reaches my shoulders. My new reality is I will have surgery in January that will permanently remove any sensation I have behind my breasts, despite how close to real boobs they will appear. My new reality is even if I beat cancer now, because of my genetic mutation, I still have a risk of reoccurrence and will continue to be watched closely for decades. My new reality is every October, I will be reminded that I have become a survivor instead of a supporter, that breast cancer will forever be a part of me. I am Superman and Clark Kent. As much as I look like Clark Kent on the outside, I've changed on the inside. </div>
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I guess what I am trying to say is everyone has complimented me on how well I'm doing. How great I look or how strong and inspiring I have been. And while these compliments are great to hear and keep me going, there are days I don't want to get out of bed. There are days I am completely exhausted. There are days I want to go back and pretend this never happened. But I will forever be a breast cancer survivor. That is my new reality. And I guess if I have to be something, being Superman really isn't so bad.</div>
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<br />Lindsayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01769555972790205358noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8502919743303964197.post-15271101212572388842016-09-14T21:16:00.002-05:002016-09-14T21:24:58.689-05:00Toots.<div dir="ltr">
Having two girls, I assumed we would bypass the bathroom humor. Oh man was I wrong, Kate cracks up over "poopie" or "tootie" with the best of them. And while I try to encourage her to reserve using potty words only in the bathroom, it was only a matter of time before Evelyn joined the club.</div>
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On the way home from school yesterday, Kate and Evelyn were cracking each other up making "toot noises" the whole way home. And now, this has become Evelyn's favorite new trick.</div>
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Tonight, she sucked me into it as well, because really, toot noises are never not funny, even as an adult. So for a little midweek humor, watch and enjoy...<br />
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Happy hump day friends, we are over half way there...</div>
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Lindsayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01769555972790205358noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8502919743303964197.post-30383273455582991982016-09-12T16:54:00.000-05:002016-09-12T17:09:34.832-05:00Pity Party for 1Well friends, it was only time before today happened. I have arrived at my pity party. As I am not one to sugar coat this journey, I'm going to be real.<br>
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I'm tired of having cancer.<br>
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I'm tired. I'm nauseous. I'm hot (one of the side effects of chemo is low grade temp) but my head gets cold easy. I have this constant unsettled feeling. I need to buy new bras because I have very few non-nursing bras, but why bother when I'll have different boobs in 3 months. My skin is dry but lotion feels weird on my skin.<br>
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I got in the shower today and had nothing to do. So I just stood there. No hair to wash. No hair to shave. I did use soap (just in case you were wondering) but then I just stood there. Thinking about how this sucks. And I don't want cancer. I want my normal life back.<br>
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Now, let me be clear, I'm not "giving up the fight" or wishing my life away, I very much want to live and be around to watch our girls grow. But chemo sucks and I don't want to do it any more. But the alternative is worse. So where does that leave us? At the Pity Party.<br>
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1 more cycle of AC next Monday and then on to Taxol. One day at a time.<br>
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<div><br></div><div>Specific prayer requests: strength in this fight for me and patience with the girls when they need my attention. </div>Lindsayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01769555972790205358noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8502919743303964197.post-89379440562206920292016-09-07T19:31:00.000-05:002016-09-07T19:31:16.467-05:00Go shawty, it's your birthday<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Nothing better than a bald lady in a party hat</td></tr>
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Saturday marked my first day of my 34th year on this planet and it was a pretty great one. Although I didn't get to sleep in, I was woken by Kate saying "Happy birthday mama!!" which was a pretty sweet way to wake up.<br />
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Shortly after, Mom and I took Evelyn and went grocery shopping (exciting, I know) and then got back in time for Mitch and I to go to a local spa and get a couples massage. He had told me a few weeks prior that he had never had a professional massage, so I figured I would bring him along for the ride!<br />
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The massage was wonderful, very relaxing, I almost feel asleep at one point but woke myself up because I wasn't paying to sleep! Mitch said he enjoyed it and would do it again for a special occasion.<br />
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We then walked through the mall a bit and finished up at Buffalo Wild Wings for an early dinner, only to be surprised to find out someone covered our bill! We don't know who this generous stranger was but we both agreed that we wanted to return the favor some day.<br />
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Once we got home, we had cake and singing and candles and party hats like any good birthday should. Even Ollie got to participate!</div>
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In the end, it was a pretty good birthday, to all of you that wished me a happy birthday through the mail, text, phone call or facebook post, thank you! I felt very loved!</div>
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Next post will be all about cycle 3, so far this cycle has been a bit tougher than the last 2, lets hope its short lived!</div>
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<br />Lindsayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01769555972790205358noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8502919743303964197.post-2199124248777208312016-09-02T22:00:00.001-05:002016-09-02T22:06:43.425-05:00State of the UnionWell friends, please accept my sincerest apologies for my lack of blogging the last two weeks, last week I was pretty run down from my second chemo cycle and this week I returned to work full time so by the time the girls were in bed, mama was tired!<br />
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So with that out of the way, we have a lot of catching up to do. So I figure I would host a state of the union post of sorts, ultimately giving an update on all things cancer and life and work and play. So get comfortable, we have some catching up to do!<br />
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Chemo cycle 2 was last Monday, the same day as my last post. It was pretty uneventful and almost identical to the first cycle in side effects and reactions. One rockstar addition was these amazing unicorn kitten rainbow socks from my great friend Jen. It doesn't get much better than a kitten sitting on clouds with angel wings, a unicorn horn and a rainbow. I'm told they came from target. #youarewelcome<br />
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Also, this is Wrigley. She was visiting all the patients while I was there and she is literally the dog we <i>thought </i>we were getting when we got Ollie. She is sweet, mellow, knee height and does not eat things she should not, you know, the things everyone looks for in a dog.</div>
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I also confidently rocked the buzz cut, cuz if you are going to fit in anywhere looking like GI Jane, its going to be at the cancer center. Wrapped in a handmade blanket from my Grandma, it had to be a good day.</div>
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My next cycle starts Tuesday since Monday is a holiday. I'm told the Tuesday after a holiday is b-a-n-a-n-a-s because all the Monday and the Tuesday patients come for treatment. Maybe I'll make the nurses some cookies. We like cookies.</div>
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Side effect update: This is best done in bulleted form.</div>
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<li><b><u>Appetite</u></b>- was about the same from cycle 1 to cycle 2, the steroids make me hungry so the first week I found myself with a decent appetite. We were shipped 6 frozen Giordonnos pizzas (and we <u style="font-style: italic;">still</u> don't know who sent them, reveal yourself pizza angel!) and it was DELICIOUS and actually tasted like pizza. Which brings me to...</li>
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<li><b><u>Taste bud change/dry mouth</u></b>- this is pretty awful, tolerable, but awful. For days 3-6, everything tastes like its coated in chalk and my mouth is like the Sahara. That is what made the pizza so delicious- I ate it during the peak of taste bud transition and the tomato sauce tasted like tomato sauce, the snozberries tasted like snozberries (RIP Gene Wilder). Another good friend of mine sent me Biotene mouthwash which has also helped with the dry mouth. </li>
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<li><u style="font-weight: bold;">Nausea</u>- again, this has been pretty manageable with the right medications. I did notice a little more nausea this cycle but I cut back on one of my medications so I'm going to see if it happens again this next cycle. I think this has to be the symptom I was worried the most about as I tend to be a puker (2 pregnancies were brutal!) and I can say that I have been pleasantly surprised how manageable it has been.</li>
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<li><b style="text-decoration: underline;">Fatigue</b>- this was a different experience for round 2. My nurse practitioner told me that most of the side effects from cycle to cycle will stay the same but fatigue will increase with each cycle and she was right. Last week I managed to work Tuesday and Wednesday but by Thursday I was just wiped. This continued until Monday. This is also when mom went back to Georgia so the timing wasn't ideal. I do worry what this next cycle has in store for me...</li>
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<li><u style="font-weight: bold;">Hair loss</u>- I have seen the most progression with this symptom and it has been the most frustrating as well. As you know, I shaved my head once I started losing large clumps of hair. Once it was short, I continued to lose hair whenever I would touch my head however this did not occur in any orderly fashion or pattern, which leads me with a awkward progression of turning into Benjamin Button. <table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEin3dosEGtHa5XOPmfPZjGxkQxYVnhFOJRNM5L-on7BOXT3y6go1nRhu7_v5bPKu-IJIiYX5_V7NXuL1q-FH1tVdH1QCyuYD7Q0gqPJAU6pUvlP5z5JKnGnqDpssjn7GcS2TRnH8lI6H20/s1600/20160822_075440.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEin3dosEGtHa5XOPmfPZjGxkQxYVnhFOJRNM5L-on7BOXT3y6go1nRhu7_v5bPKu-IJIiYX5_V7NXuL1q-FH1tVdH1QCyuYD7Q0gqPJAU6pUvlP5z5JKnGnqDpssjn7GcS2TRnH8lI6H20/s320/20160822_075440.jpg" width="240" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Just a reminder, this is my freshly shaved hairy head for reference<br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">This is a week later as random patches began to fall out, with others remaining firmly affixed<br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">And now, its like I am wearing a hairy yarmulke</td></tr>
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So desperate times call for desperate measures. I am so desperate to get this hair off of my head, not only because of the less than ideal aesthetics, but also, it HURTS. The best way to describe it is the hair that is left on my head feels like little fiberglass slivers in my head, especially when it is brushed against the growth of the hair. I'm over it. I want it out.<br />
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I contemplated waxing it, but that seemed painful and messy. I also thought about shaving it, but I'm sure I would cut my head and that would suck. So the next best thing....</div>
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LINT ROLLER!!</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgiG3N5qnCruvXJptwlgBwlRMQEkvK7i72kHGoGCCMmjBsU87jtzXU3RCtg84o1BPwV3GTdANFv2LFDt4m1QzTWKDkcygZ68sAljnea1v8qjtPn11ubBYCgRuQQud8d1TJiu3-_fL1YbTk/s1600/20160902_204132.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgiG3N5qnCruvXJptwlgBwlRMQEkvK7i72kHGoGCCMmjBsU87jtzXU3RCtg84o1BPwV3GTdANFv2LFDt4m1QzTWKDkcygZ68sAljnea1v8qjtPn11ubBYCgRuQQud8d1TJiu3-_fL1YbTk/s320/20160902_204132.jpg" width="240" /></a></div>
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Or just use the whole sheet without the roller. </div>
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Unfortunately, my yarmulke is staying put for now. Maybe after my 3rd cycle these holdouts will finally throw in the towel and I can get a smooth, shiny head Mr. Clean style. Until then, I guess I'll keep complaining.</div>
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Well friends, I hope this gave you an update on how I am doing, I could write about a million other things, but its 10 pm and time for bed. Tomorrow morning I will wake up another year older and another year closer to 40, which is somewhat terrifying. But 33 has been a challenging year so lets hope 34 has a few tricks up its sleeve. I promise I won't be a stranger and I'll keep the posts coming. Happy weekend everyone!</div>
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Lindsayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01769555972790205358noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8502919743303964197.post-14946076963689502452016-08-22T22:45:00.000-05:002016-08-22T22:48:45.044-05:00Hair today, gone tomorrow part I<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
Ha, you see what I did there? I'm so funny on chemo. Today's post will be how my hair finally decided to say see ya later and begin falling out of my head. Come along on the journey...it has tequila!</div>
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I mentioned in my previous post that I had read that with my type of chemo, hair loss is usually between days 12-14 after the first infusion. As you all know, I cut my hair 3 weeks ago in anticipation of this event and while it gave me a thrill knowing what I would look like with a pixie cut, my hair is just not suited for that length. It's SUPER curly and hard to control and too short to try to straighten so I ended up giving into the chaos and letting it do whatever it wanted. See exhibit A below...<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhrnrKC4mrcYcMNtebwUxqgkVsAKrUSI_-i17ctCLSBVBFU3tM1zJBwKirzFXwYPaHz0SwUk_p8DZEkUzEn-8P0dXK1E7FhyHdw8FWuyttd0XieBWC1nQJ0EF85bPyElJ6IXaNpKSWvqPY/s1600/20160811_095356.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhrnrKC4mrcYcMNtebwUxqgkVsAKrUSI_-i17ctCLSBVBFU3tM1zJBwKirzFXwYPaHz0SwUk_p8DZEkUzEn-8P0dXK1E7FhyHdw8FWuyttd0XieBWC1nQJ0EF85bPyElJ6IXaNpKSWvqPY/s320/20160811_095356.jpg" width="240" /></a></div>
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So to say I was secretly looking forward to hair ground zero would be an understatement. Beginning day 12, I would give a little tug on my hair only to be disappointed when it would still be firmly affixed at the root. I did this probably 10 times throughout the day to no avail and went to bed convinced it would happen on Saturday (day 13).<br />
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Saturday came and went, same test of change, same result. Later in the day I went for a mani/pedi with a dear friend of mine and we talked about how ready I was for it to fall out, I was tired of my curly mop, how ironic would it be if it didn't fall out and I just spent a fortune on a wig, etc. etc. Saturday night came around and I started to have some doubts. What if it didn't fall out?<br />
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Sunday rolled around and as I got ready for church, yet again, all hair follicles weren't giving up the goods. I went with mom to check out an open house around 12:30, hair was still staying put. Later that afternoon, I was planning on attending a Lularoe party to try on a few items before purchasing and I was a little nervous because I didn't know many people that would be there and while I have no problem sharing my story publicly with all of you, it's a little awkward with total strangers. At a leggings party. The last thing I wanted to be was Debbie Downer.<br />
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Then 3:30 came around, I performed my test pull and my hair said, PEACE, we are outta here. I lost a whole sideburn. An hour before I was supposed to leave for the party. Apparently God does still have a sense of humor.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjKK1NIEKX6zMZMh4t7IOKcShQCpP8FOwQHnTm8-5AF7mc8fn5E3kP0fwA_uuJIF7BgJpv36_1R22Wp5V62TYRo7lGG-ykAy9YTaeZci5M7E_zMXeEUJuBd-gvUodr1s5AVtbEKnlfE9Ak/s1600/20160821_195959.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjKK1NIEKX6zMZMh4t7IOKcShQCpP8FOwQHnTm8-5AF7mc8fn5E3kP0fwA_uuJIF7BgJpv36_1R22Wp5V62TYRo7lGG-ykAy9YTaeZci5M7E_zMXeEUJuBd-gvUodr1s5AVtbEKnlfE9Ak/s320/20160821_195959.jpg" width="240" /></a></div>
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So I came up with a plan that I would refrain from touching my head until AFTER the party. And if it randomly fell out <i>at</i> the party, well then it would be a pretty sweet party trick, "watch me lose my hair using only my MIND".</div>
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Luckily, the party was uneventful, I was gifted a VERY awesome care package from my rockstar charge nurses at work, which contained more leggings and shirts and comfy clothes that are AMAZING! Truly, the generosity I have received from all of you is humbling and overwhelming and touching and #allthefeels. But that is for a different post...</div>
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Once the party was over, it was time for the real party start. My friend Jen wanted to come over last night anyway, so I totally roped her into shaving my head. As a true friend would, she willingly accepted and brought chips and salsa and ranch to make it a real party, Ole!</div>
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While mentally, I was pretty ready for this, a little tequila never hurts so I made a makeshift margarita with frozen limeade and some Cuervo, which ended up being DELICIOUS! When life doesn't hand you margarita mix, you make margaritas anyway.</div>
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Kate was still up for all these shenanigans so I really wanted her to be involved to make it less scary. We have been talking about how I was going to lose my hair because of "the medicine I get in my button (port)", to which she responded, "can I press your button and make your hair fall out?!?!?". So cute, but not quite that simple!</div>
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I asked her if she wanted to help cut mommy's hair, which was met with an <i><u>ENTHUSIASTIC</u></i> "YES!!" so we plopped a chair in our kitchen, I took a swig of my marg and the show began.</div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgIqPXd50PKkSbr0qwjc258gB8AQvKUrowtP21TO5m5jk69nzc_FlRErI5aWXK4QeurGwCUBbmjxVDXDwJkpZvemg2A258OURETu37qWyl5LZqbgGDMYUCaY4lvCml80FvjDUEGO_-zUMk/s1600/20160821_202112.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgIqPXd50PKkSbr0qwjc258gB8AQvKUrowtP21TO5m5jk69nzc_FlRErI5aWXK4QeurGwCUBbmjxVDXDwJkpZvemg2A258OURETu37qWyl5LZqbgGDMYUCaY4lvCml80FvjDUEGO_-zUMk/s320/20160821_202112.jpg" width="240" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Getting ready to start</td></tr>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgMLgPCnO_NTNjsLY-VsrSkFDQSkxHS-FfxqBD2RPf9Pl33I-AWBVu8v_QeZ4vHyXNhwCCc1RtIZUQwF4smRkQQVpDgDi3TMiJkR3NYZSPnErssXScpUa5YraTmtg2ewKOF7_jnIrQ02nk/s1600/IMG_9530.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgMLgPCnO_NTNjsLY-VsrSkFDQSkxHS-FfxqBD2RPf9Pl33I-AWBVu8v_QeZ4vHyXNhwCCc1RtIZUQwF4smRkQQVpDgDi3TMiJkR3NYZSPnErssXScpUa5YraTmtg2ewKOF7_jnIrQ02nk/s320/IMG_9530.jpg" width="240" /></a></div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgXQA56An9tnlZ-2mgQzHAho3y7M9D_8dggT4Uy3IRrHapiDIxYtEeZFSGgWvcEmscEqKUBjwdfNjT2TkMGjw4QHMXQYHimmM2ZM62A4qynrD6iL5tpcOjUli9Pza6ti3uPWQvm9WIZvSE/s1600/20160821_203019.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgXQA56An9tnlZ-2mgQzHAho3y7M9D_8dggT4Uy3IRrHapiDIxYtEeZFSGgWvcEmscEqKUBjwdfNjT2TkMGjw4QHMXQYHimmM2ZM62A4qynrD6iL5tpcOjUli9Pza6ti3uPWQvm9WIZvSE/s320/20160821_203019.jpg" width="240" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">We made a mohawk first because why not??</td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg4iFugor6cCYRy1FLRh06PuhIdmpLttG0ZYmTt2ENckH5mS8GkqANPpGZXEuttVUYl1BaHCO1F1VANxoeeB88M-MI-NpxkFsjD7Bw6MM4xgxjK3CqmJZ9eqcmCVjnn_aKO1-ocUo4Tdr4/s1600/20160821_203028.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg4iFugor6cCYRy1FLRh06PuhIdmpLttG0ZYmTt2ENckH5mS8GkqANPpGZXEuttVUYl1BaHCO1F1VANxoeeB88M-MI-NpxkFsjD7Bw6MM4xgxjK3CqmJZ9eqcmCVjnn_aKO1-ocUo4Tdr4/s320/20160821_203028.jpg" width="240" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">"Mommy, you look funny!"</td></tr>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiNiy4LY1y2ITxrfFRIpuaoQ2TpTIxrjVIcHOPK6ebltpup0mRIXzSULMUbrVEpfB2KbMfdHxHdVAekUb-nGu0GRPS4Vzw6KYvZxODxEzEg2FgpzNjjc9N8qcYg5UhOKr491Q8zYqQZHlA/s1600/IMG_5664.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiNiy4LY1y2ITxrfFRIpuaoQ2TpTIxrjVIcHOPK6ebltpup0mRIXzSULMUbrVEpfB2KbMfdHxHdVAekUb-nGu0GRPS4Vzw6KYvZxODxEzEg2FgpzNjjc9N8qcYg5UhOKr491Q8zYqQZHlA/s320/IMG_5664.jpg" width="240" /></a></div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiWiUOYbU2U9EbXxUWWB51XmfQJ5luIzreWzoW27U6DXwBaQyRUDXAAtY9bSupYUYitMFJTQd59DMIF7nFC6640HSEpsD4JuU_tMckl_Pagb_13Qulbm4V2mAULk-TXSE31ObCpjxnVngI/s1600/IMG_4179.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiWiUOYbU2U9EbXxUWWB51XmfQJ5luIzreWzoW27U6DXwBaQyRUDXAAtY9bSupYUYitMFJTQd59DMIF7nFC6640HSEpsD4JuU_tMckl_Pagb_13Qulbm4V2mAULk-TXSE31ObCpjxnVngI/s320/IMG_4179.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Love these two girls</td></tr>
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjx7lVhn7uAX5rVhBZ65CVLljNlGR4x7dw1l4R4jeEiUbYVt2LnMVCWbYzma_0RELjwb7UwLm95nUBNFiC9AHmgw0O5C-avmLhTpuJuyIZM2lL1P7kjhAP0vY0pzmtwKdX5tjQ2K8OAc-4/s1600/20160821_202852.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjx7lVhn7uAX5rVhBZ65CVLljNlGR4x7dw1l4R4jeEiUbYVt2LnMVCWbYzma_0RELjwb7UwLm95nUBNFiC9AHmgw0O5C-avmLhTpuJuyIZM2lL1P7kjhAP0vY0pzmtwKdX5tjQ2K8OAc-4/s320/20160821_202852.jpg" width="240" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">I took a drink of margarita, she wanted some too, so when I said no, enter total meltdown #threenager</td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEguC-Tk0yf73rZGZ0Q3lilFz16oO5MjDoBWSrFzZg8qBDiKzW6WN1ZYBKRwiMb88YLtu78cbA6qWP_pVyhlqxfoZincoa-bvW0UBTMXfmSzNmKL9irJvLO9lmMcLOdA-VbJOjAn1czSrWM/s1600/20160821_203842.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEguC-Tk0yf73rZGZ0Q3lilFz16oO5MjDoBWSrFzZg8qBDiKzW6WN1ZYBKRwiMb88YLtu78cbA6qWP_pVyhlqxfoZincoa-bvW0UBTMXfmSzNmKL9irJvLO9lmMcLOdA-VbJOjAn1czSrWM/s320/20160821_203842.jpg" width="240" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">So we put some yellow gatorade in a margarita glass and she was happy. <br />
This I'm sure we resurface at her graduation party as the day she had her first drink.</td></tr>
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhtgq5Cn-tHa9Aqn7K07KLxtUqeri4rJb_9xgLJj7DzO3hK60skSMA5_hWXL8Q8EeexsQmcli9SGKkOode6tikCQJBVqHfN3hroCSIT7gU4zCN0rbU4Whu98qeRDRI9tT-1icpAKVcPZEI/s1600/20160821_204239.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhtgq5Cn-tHa9Aqn7K07KLxtUqeri4rJb_9xgLJj7DzO3hK60skSMA5_hWXL8Q8EeexsQmcli9SGKkOode6tikCQJBVqHfN3hroCSIT7gU4zCN0rbU4Whu98qeRDRI9tT-1icpAKVcPZEI/s320/20160821_204239.jpg" width="240" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">See ya curly blond hair<br />
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</tbody></table>
Saving the best for last, I wanted to upload a short video but I'm having some technical difficulties getting it to load, so I will have Mitch help me with it tomorrow. Sorry!<br />
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I'm pretty happy with the final product. Eventually all these little tiny baby hairs will fall out too and I will be left with one naked, cold head but until then, I'm totally rocking the GI Jane look. I had chemo cycle 2 today, so I will post more about that midweek but it went really well. Starting to feel a little crummy as I write this now but hopefully its nothing a little sleep can't fix tonight.</div>
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Thank you for the prayers and support! Specific prayer requests for this week:</div>
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Evelyn- that she can get over this cold and be healthy!</div>
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Kate- we are trying a new bedtime routine, so that she is asleep before the Tonight Show comes on! Prayers that she falls asleep quickly without too much trouble</div>
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Mitch- prayers for his second week of black belt training at Cat, he is doing well with it but its intense and stressful so prayers for peace and an easy week!</div>
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Me- Prayers for minimal side effects again this week, hoping it goes as well as cycle 1</div>
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And lastly, my mom flies home to Georgia for a few days this Thursday, so prayers for safe travel for her is appreciated!</div>
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Lindsayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01769555972790205358noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8502919743303964197.post-67717018533281608512016-08-19T08:52:00.003-05:002016-08-19T08:52:52.559-05:00Infectious diseaseSorry blogland for my absence the last few days, after my post on Monday, I decided to make things a little more interesting and contract every infectious disease possible. Let me explain...<br />
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My first round of chemo was on 8/8. Because chemotherapy targets rapidly dividing cells (like cancer cells), it also effects your white blood cells (responsible for fighting infection). On 8/9, I got a shot called Neulasta which is supposed to help boost my white blood cells during chemo, but I will still see a drop in my white blood cells about 7 days after my infusion.<br />
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This would put my white blood cell count at its lowest, leaving me most prone to infection, on this past Sunday.<br />
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Which also just happened to be the day I thought it would be a great idea to take the girls to the Children's Museum.<br />
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I entered the museum with my family and a smile, and left covered with germs. When my counts were my lowest. In retrospect, this was a poor poor choice.<br />
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So I will let you enjoy the photos of happier times...</div>
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Because this happened by Tuesday....</div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhQCLx_BEsHxESnDU6S4i5y4_oGI6nT4obo8_EGemHwaBlugNnkrT-qQdW_ZHDd42eDoBIcOrz7icEIQUJ6e4COvyqTlqbVQQ7eZC3LXAWWxuliVUFTjn_86ASiFsEPeGD87SuUL-qJokg/s1600/20160816_103544.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhQCLx_BEsHxESnDU6S4i5y4_oGI6nT4obo8_EGemHwaBlugNnkrT-qQdW_ZHDd42eDoBIcOrz7icEIQUJ6e4COvyqTlqbVQQ7eZC3LXAWWxuliVUFTjn_86ASiFsEPeGD87SuUL-qJokg/s320/20160816_103544.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">This is me, laying on the waiting room couch because I physically cannot sit up. Stupid kid germs.<br /><br /><div style="text-align: left;">
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I woke up Tuesday morning at 4 am unable to keep anything down, even water. By 9 am, we called the onocology office thinking that I must be having some delayed reaction to the chemo. They had us head into the office, at which time I had lab work and a chest xray, followed by a visit by the nurse practioner and some IV steroids and hydration. During my chest xray, I could barely stand for the xray as my blood pressure was in the 80s/50s by that point. <div>
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Once everything came back and I had a physical exam, the nurse practioner diagnosed me with the stomach flu (this was a give-in, my stomach was rejecting everything I tried to put in it), a sinus infection, an ear infection, impending pneumonia (my xray was a little cloudy but not terrible yet) and potentially strep throat or thrush (my rapid strep ended up negative).</div>
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I mean honestly, is it even possible to get that many things at once? Apparently, when you are dumb enough to take a cancer patient to a children's museum, it is. I should really be smarter...</div>
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The good news is after my IV fluids and meds and a lot of rest, I am feeling a million times better and I have learned my lesson. But to add insult to injury, my dear mother made me go <u style="font-weight: bold;">IN</u> to Dairy Queen with her looking like this:</div>
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I'm sure this is cosmic payback for something I did to her as a child. Touche mom, touche.</div>
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So, in the end, I definitely learned my lesson and will be much more cautious of my weak immune system. Today is day 12 after my infusion, so while my white count is on its way back up, today marks the beginning of when my hair will likely begin to vacate my head. This may seem odd but I am actually looking forward to getting this mop off my head, its crazy curly and dry and I just don't have the talent to style it.</div>
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So here's to staying healthy and enjoying the weekend before chemo round 2 on Monday!</div>
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Lindsayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01769555972790205358noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8502919743303964197.post-38497223833058038862016-08-15T13:36:00.000-05:002016-08-15T13:36:22.357-05:00R is for...<div>
Today's post is brought to you by the letter R for random, as I'm just going to put down whatever comes to mind. I hope you enjoy, or at the very least, make it to the end of this post.</div>
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<u>R is for Restlessness</u></div>
One unique problem I have had this last week is physically, I am exhausted. Like I don't want to pick up my arm kind of tired. Unfortunately, my brain did not RSVP to this party and much like a certain 3 year old we know, she does NOT want to go to bed. No amount of coaxing, essential oils, white noise or dim lights will persuade her to go down for the night. So I am finding myself in this perpetual awake but exhausted state. Ambien has been helping at bedtime, but I still wake feeling less than rested.<div>
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<div>
So today, while I should be napping and my muscles are screaming "go to sleep", I am laying on the couch watching Little Rascals and writing this blog post because my brain says "let's party!!". All in favor of relaxing on the couch say "Yoi Yoi Yoi Yoi Yoi!!!"</div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiZak1rq5H6mxUKju77xO1u1rmRKnWbIP1wkPhQaNKMSPu4ia3b6XVUk_a5f-aFMT4aUdircejcAGDMq9iIPwr1612ljc8t2Wdpf9WN7QhXHGJWmRlN-gq52fAs3U0h5C35c-STAUqXUXY/s1600/little-rascals-20-year-anniversary.gif" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="169" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiZak1rq5H6mxUKju77xO1u1rmRKnWbIP1wkPhQaNKMSPu4ia3b6XVUk_a5f-aFMT4aUdircejcAGDMq9iIPwr1612ljc8t2Wdpf9WN7QhXHGJWmRlN-gq52fAs3U0h5C35c-STAUqXUXY/s320/little-rascals-20-year-anniversary.gif" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">I mean seriously, this movie is the BEST.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
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<u>R is for Really good labs</u></div>
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So I had my "toxicity check" with my nurse practitioner at the cancer center today and the good news is, my side effects have been minimal and manageable (KEEP IT UP PRAYER WARRIORS, it's working!!!!). My WBCs were 6.4, Hgb was 12.2 and platelets were above 150,000, which is great news. If my wbcs are less than 1 or platelets are below 100,000 it will delay my treatment, so we are on target to stay on time for cycle 2 next week. Yay, more poison!</div>
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<u>R is for Re-entry (I know, its a stretch, just go with it)</u></div>
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During my above mentioned lab draw, the phlebotomist accessed my port again to get my blood and holy stabby mcstabberton, that sucked. R also needs to be for Remind me to use EMLA next time, youch! </div>
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<u>R is for 'Roe</u></div>
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I know many of you have already jumped on the LulaRoe bandwagon but I have been blissfully ignorant until this weekend. I reached out to my coworkers (whom I KNOW are on the bandwagon, they are driving the silly thing!) to learn a bit more about them as I hear they make very comfy clothes and cancer = an excuse to be comfy. Well, within a day of my posting, a new pair of leggings showed up on my doorstep (Rachel, you are wonderful, thank you again!) and wowza, these things have to be made from unicorn hair or fairy wings or something because clearly they are not of this world. </div>
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Needless to say, I predict some new leggings in my future...</div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Kate feeling my leggings, that's right, the are so soft you just want to touch them!</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
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<u>R is for Rachel</u></div>
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Rachel is the name of my wig. I did not give her this name, the wig makers did, but I do think its rather fitting and it goes along with our theme today so....</div>
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I had an appt yesterday to try on my new wig and left a little disappointed only because I look like I am wearing a hair helmet. They washed it and styled it for me and I picked up the final product today. It looks a little better today but will still take some getting used to. The price tag was also about double what I thought I would be spending, so that was pretty disheartening as well (like I previously mentioned, insurance doesn't cover wigs). I have an appointment with the American Cancer Society in two weeks to check out their "free wig bank" so that might give me a second option. But don't tell Rachel, I don't want her feelings to be hurt ;) Also, the picture below is no-makeup, no filter so ignore the bags under my eyes!</div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEieqFLfXB78PPvPmndgGWfWb1_G3Kslmo28ppSDmsPod6tjrp2h0lESt1a0L10yHiR5hpApLsP3dPtpoPYSuFfnnbftu2oN0kqQmHIPrJojXHE3EWqdK3LnDgNj5E_2wccOKqxsER28k6w/s1600/20160815_122249.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEieqFLfXB78PPvPmndgGWfWb1_G3Kslmo28ppSDmsPod6tjrp2h0lESt1a0L10yHiR5hpApLsP3dPtpoPYSuFfnnbftu2oN0kqQmHIPrJojXHE3EWqdK3LnDgNj5E_2wccOKqxsER28k6w/s320/20160815_122249.jpg" width="240" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Me + Rachel<br /><br /></td></tr>
</tbody></table>
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<u>R is for Relief </u></div>
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Finances are always a concern whenever a diagnosis of cancer is involved. Initially I was told if I have intermittent FMLA during my treatments, I would have to take my time off unpaid as I would not qualify for short term disability. Well, good news internet friends, we found a loophole and it looks like I will be able to work and get short term disability for my days off during treatments!!! This is such a relief to know that I will still be contributing financially to our family and that we don't have to sell all of our things to afford daycare.</div>
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<u>R is for Rations</u></div>
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Lastly, so many of you have asked how you can help our family or have volunteered to bring us a meal. I have created a meal train account that will allow any of you to sign up for a night to bring us a meal, if you are wanting to help. My mom is going back to Georgia next week for a short time, so we are starting the sign up for next week, as it is also my treatment week. Mitch and Kate have a dairy sensitivity so while they can tolerate some cheese, milk, etc. a 5 cheese lasagna might not be the best option for us. I just want to say thank you in advance to all of you that are willing to help us out, whether it be providing a meal, being an ear to listen or a shoulder to cry on. Thank you!</div>
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<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: large;">Hop aboard the <a href="https://mealtrain.com/rv135d" target="_blank">Meal Train</a>, choo choo!!!</span></div>
Lindsayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01769555972790205358noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8502919743303964197.post-76806139357440754312016-08-13T11:27:00.002-05:002016-08-13T11:27:55.768-05:00Mutant.<br />
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Hello again friends, we are currently on cycle 1 day 6 and today has been a bit better than yesterday. Yesterday was my first day without steroids on board and the lack of energy was definitely noticeable. It also didn't help that it was a gloomy, rainy day all day either. I found myself feeling a little down both physically and mentally but today has been a better day so far. Still staying up on the anti-nausea meds. Between those and all of the prayers we are receiving on a daily basis, I am feeling pretty good considering. I would be lying if I said I was looking forward to my next 3 infusions but for now, we need to take one tiny baby step at a time,<br />
<br />
I thought I would take an opportunity in today's post to explain how we got to where we are today, not in the "first mommies and daddies love each other very much" kind of way, but more in the "I have a genetic mutation that gives me cancer" kind of way.<br />
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So let's jump in shall we??<br />
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For those of you that don't know me well, my dad passed away in 2013 after an 8 month battle with pancreatic cancer. It was fast and fierce and ugly and heart wrenching. We found out he had cancer on the day I was due with Kate (she wouldn't come until 5 days later, already stubborn, even as a fetus) and he was gone before her first birthday. Cancer really sucks.<br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Kate, Dad and Patti</td></tr>
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Fast forward to almost a year later and I was seeing my NP for my annual exam/initial OB appointment (I was early pregnant with Evelyn). Kim was going through my family history and mentioned that I would be a candidate for genetic testing because of the cancer on my dad's side of the family. Knowing I was just beginning another pregnancy (and continued to associate Kate's pregnancy with dad getting sick), I wasn't emotionally ready to do the testing. We agreed there was no rush and I could get it done after the baby was born.</div>
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Life with two little ones is pretty hectic so it wasn't until December that I got my butt to the office and blood drawn for the test. I knew the implications of the test going in, I could have a positive result and be at a higher risk for cancer. Or I could have a negative result and still be at a higher risk for cancer because of my family history. What did I have to lose?</div>
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We made it through the holidays and most of January had come and gone before my test results were in. Mitch and I met with Kim in the office and she gave us the unfortunate news, my genes are mutated. Not like in the Ninja Turtle sense (although I am fond of pizza) but in the "you just signed up for an increased risk of 4 different cancers sense". Well Damn.<br />
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So, what does having a BRCA2 gene mutation really mean? Let me try to explain.</div>
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We all have a unique set of genes that determine who we are and what we look like. These genes come equally from our parents, a 50/50 split. Sometimes genes are broken (mutated) from the beginning (passed on from mom or dad, thanks guys!) or sometimes they break due to environmental factors (sun exposure = mutated genes = skin cancer)</div>
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Everyone has a BRCA1 and BRCA2 gene responsible for keeping certain cells in our body dividing at a normal rate. It's like a quality control system, if the cells get out of control, BRCA1/2 shut down the party. The problem becomes when one of those genes are broken, no one calls the cops and cells can grow out of control and become cancer. This gene is not only associated with breast cancer, but also ovarian, pancreatic, prostate and melanoma cancers. My BRCA1 is normal, my BRCA2 is not.</div>
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Prior to me discovering I already had cancer, my statistics looked a little something like this:</div>
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<u>Average women’s risk of cancer in her lifetime:<o:p></o:p></u></div>
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Breast: 1 in 8 (12%)<o:p></o:p></div>
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Ovarian: 1 in 70 (1.4%)<o:p></o:p></div>
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Pancreatic: 1 in 100 (1%)<o:p></o:p></div>
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Melanoma: <1 in 100 <o:p></o:p></div>
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<u>My risk of cancer in my lifetime (with a gene mutation):</u><o:p></o:p></div>
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Breast: 80%<o:p></o:p></div>
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Ovarian: 45%<o:p></o:p></div>
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Pancreatic: 7-25%**<o:p></o:p></div>
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Melanoma: increased risk<o:p></o:p></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">**risk varies depending on family history, I haven't been told my specific risk just yet.</span></div>
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As you can see, every woman has a chance of getting breast cancer in her lifetime and the number of women with cancers related to genetic mutations is rather small when looking at the total population. However, because I am one exceptional human being, I decided to get cancer right away and avoid the waiting game (insert sarcasm).</div>
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When we were told about my BRCA2 status, the plan was to nurse Evelyn until she was a year old (June 29), get a diagnostic mammogram in July as a baseline, meet with a breast surgeon and plastic surgeon in August and then proceed with a prophylactic mastectomy in September. Even before I knew I had cancer, I was ready to say good bye to the ticking time bombs on my chest. Unfortunately (or maybe fortunately) for me, they got to me first. </div>
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There are a couple things I want to mention very clearly in this post. Kim saved my life by encouraging me to be tested. Not in the superfluous way, but in the very literal sense of the word. If I would not have been tested, I wouldn't have known I was positive. Because I was positive, I qualified to have a mammogram far earlier than a "normal" woman would. Because I had this mammogram, we discovered my cancer very early and proceeded with treatment 3 weeks later. BRCA2 saved my life.</div>
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That being said, having this mutation is rather rare, so I don't want to freak you all out into thinking you have it because your grandma's neighbors cousin had cancer in her 30s. Taken straight from cancer.gov, here are indications to consider testing:</div>
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<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="background-color: #fffffb; color: #2e2e2e; line-height: 1.5em;">Because harmful </span><i style="background-color: #fffffb; border: 0px; box-sizing: border-box; color: #2e2e2e; font-stretch: inherit; font-variant: inherit; font-weight: inherit; line-height: inherit; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">BRCA1</i><span style="background-color: #fffffb; color: #2e2e2e; line-height: 1.5em;"> </span><span style="background-color: #fffffb; color: #2e2e2e; line-height: 1.5em;">and</span><span style="background-color: #fffffb; color: #2e2e2e; line-height: 1.5em;"> </span><i style="background-color: #fffffb; border: 0px; box-sizing: border-box; color: #2e2e2e; font-stretch: inherit; font-variant: inherit; font-weight: inherit; line-height: inherit; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">BRCA2</i><span style="background-color: #fffffb; color: #2e2e2e; line-height: 1.5em;"> </span><span style="background-color: #fffffb; color: #2e2e2e; line-height: 1.5em;">gene mutations are relatively rare in the general population, most experts agree that mutation testing of individuals who do not have cancer should be performed only when the person’s individual or</span><span style="background-color: #fffffb; color: #2e2e2e; line-height: 1.5em;"> </span><a class="definition" href="http://www.cancer.gov/Common/PopUps/popDefinition.aspx?id=CDR0000302456&version=Patient&language=English" style="background-color: #fffffb; border-bottom-style: dotted; border-color: initial; border-width: 0px 0px thin; box-sizing: border-box; color: #2e2e2e; font-stretch: inherit; font-style: inherit; font-variant: inherit; font-weight: inherit; line-height: inherit; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;">family history</a><span style="background-color: #fffffb; color: #2e2e2e; line-height: 1.5em;"> </span><span style="background-color: #fffffb; color: #2e2e2e; line-height: 1.5em;">suggests the possible presence of a harmful mutation in</span><span style="background-color: #fffffb; color: #2e2e2e; line-height: 1.5em;"> </span><i style="background-color: #fffffb; border: 0px; box-sizing: border-box; color: #2e2e2e; font-stretch: inherit; font-variant: inherit; font-weight: inherit; line-height: inherit; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">BRCA1</i><span style="background-color: #fffffb; color: #2e2e2e; line-height: 1.5em;"> </span><span style="background-color: #fffffb; color: #2e2e2e; line-height: 1.5em;">or</span><span style="background-color: #fffffb; color: #2e2e2e; line-height: 1.5em;"> </span><i style="background-color: #fffffb; border: 0px; box-sizing: border-box; color: #2e2e2e; font-stretch: inherit; font-variant: inherit; font-weight: inherit; line-height: inherit; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">BRCA2</i><span style="background-color: #fffffb; color: #2e2e2e; line-height: 1.5em;">.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;">In December 2013, the United States Preventive Services Task Force recommended that women who have family members with breast, ovarian, fallopian tube, or peritoneal cancer be evaluated to see if they have a family history that is associated with an increased risk of a harmful mutation in one of these genes (<a href="http://www.cancer.gov/about-cancer/causes-prevention/genetics/brca-fact-sheet#r17" style="border: 0px; box-sizing: border-box; color: #2b7bba; font-stretch: inherit; font-style: inherit; font-variant: inherit; font-weight: inherit; line-height: inherit; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;">17</a>).</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;">Several screening tools are now available to help health care providers with this evaluation (<a href="http://www.cancer.gov/about-cancer/causes-prevention/genetics/brca-fact-sheet#r17" style="border: 0px; box-sizing: border-box; color: #2b7bba; font-stretch: inherit; font-style: inherit; font-variant: inherit; font-weight: inherit; line-height: inherit; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;">17</a>). These tools assess family history factors that are associated with an increased likelihood of having a harmful mutation in<i style="border: 0px; box-sizing: border-box; font-stretch: inherit; font-variant: inherit; font-weight: inherit; line-height: inherit; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">BRCA1</i> or <i style="border: 0px; box-sizing: border-box; font-stretch: inherit; font-variant: inherit; font-weight: inherit; line-height: inherit; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">BRCA2</i>, including:</span></div>
<div start="1" style="background-color: #fffffb; border: 0px; box-sizing: border-box; color: #2e2e2e; direction: ltr; font-stretch: inherit; font-variant-numeric: inherit; line-height: 22px; margin: 0px 0px 0px 2em; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;" type="1">
<ul style="border: 0px; box-sizing: border-box; direction: ltr; font-stretch: inherit; font-style: inherit; font-variant: inherit; font-weight: inherit; line-height: 1.5; list-style: none outside; margin: 0px 0px 1em; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;" type="disc">
<li style="border: 0px; box-sizing: border-box; direction: ltr; font-stretch: inherit; font-style: inherit; font-variant: inherit; font-weight: inherit; line-height: inherit; list-style-type: none; margin: 0.5em 0px 0.5em 28px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;">Breast cancer diagnosed before age 50 years</span></li>
<li style="border: 0px; box-sizing: border-box; direction: ltr; font-stretch: inherit; font-style: inherit; font-variant: inherit; font-weight: inherit; line-height: inherit; list-style-type: none; margin: 0.5em 0px 0.5em 28px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;">Cancer in both breasts in the same woman</span></li>
<li style="border: 0px; box-sizing: border-box; direction: ltr; font-stretch: inherit; font-style: inherit; font-variant: inherit; font-weight: inherit; line-height: inherit; list-style-type: none; margin: 0.5em 0px 0.5em 28px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;">Both breast and ovarian cancers in either the same woman or the same family</span></li>
<li style="border: 0px; box-sizing: border-box; direction: ltr; font-stretch: inherit; font-style: inherit; font-variant: inherit; font-weight: inherit; line-height: inherit; list-style-type: none; margin: 0.5em 0px 0.5em 28px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;">Multiple breast cancers</span></li>
<li style="border: 0px; box-sizing: border-box; direction: ltr; font-stretch: inherit; font-style: inherit; font-variant: inherit; font-weight: inherit; line-height: inherit; list-style-type: none; margin: 0.5em 0px 0.5em 28px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;">Two or more primary types of <i style="border: 0px; box-sizing: border-box; font-stretch: inherit; font-variant: inherit; font-weight: inherit; line-height: inherit; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">BRCA1-</i> or <i style="border: 0px; box-sizing: border-box; font-stretch: inherit; font-variant: inherit; font-weight: inherit; line-height: inherit; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">BRCA2</i>-related cancers in a single family member</span></li>
<li style="border: 0px; box-sizing: border-box; direction: ltr; font-stretch: inherit; font-style: inherit; font-variant: inherit; font-weight: inherit; line-height: inherit; list-style-type: none; margin: 0.5em 0px 0.5em 28px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;">Cases of <a class="definition" href="http://www.cancer.gov/Common/PopUps/popDefinition.aspx?id=CDR0000445046&version=Patient&language=English" style="border-bottom-style: solid; border-color: initial; border-width: 0px 0px thin; box-sizing: border-box; color: #2e2e2e; cursor: pointer; font-stretch: inherit; font-style: inherit; font-variant: inherit; font-weight: inherit; line-height: inherit; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;">male breast cancer</a></span></li>
<li style="border: 0px; box-sizing: border-box; direction: ltr; font-stretch: inherit; font-style: inherit; font-variant: inherit; font-weight: inherit; line-height: inherit; list-style-type: none; margin: 0.5em 0px 0.5em 28px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><a class="definition" href="http://www.cancer.gov/Common/PopUps/popDefinition.aspx?id=CDR0000460127&version=Patient&language=English" style="border-bottom-style: dotted; border-color: initial; border-width: 0px 0px thin; box-sizing: border-box; color: #2e2e2e; font-stretch: inherit; font-style: inherit; font-variant: inherit; font-weight: inherit; line-height: inherit; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;">Ashkenazi Jewish</a> ethnicity</span></li>
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<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;">Or in my case, a family history of breast cancer diagnosed before 50, pancreatic cancer and prostate cancer all on one side of the family. Now that I know I am BRCA2 mutated, I can pretty confidently deduce that Dad was as well.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;">The second complicated piece to this puzzle involve Kate and Evelyn. Because this mutation is passed down from parent to child, our girls have a 50/50 shot of carrying it as well. Right now, there is nothing in the literature recommending young girls to be tested before the age of 18 when they can fully understand and comprehend what a positive result might mean for them. I fully intend on educating both of them about my cancer and my genetics as they grow older, but the decision to be tested will be entirely up to them. There is also an optimistic part of me that thinks treatment/screening options 20 years from now could mean a completely different outcome for them compared to me. One can only hope...</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;">This post is beginning to border a novel so I am going to cut it here, but if any of you dear readers have questions about BRCA or my story in general, I am an open book and more than happy to answer any question you might have! Just put it in the comments below.</span></div>
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Now its time for a nap!</div>
Lindsayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01769555972790205358noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8502919743303964197.post-19207617042256772602016-08-10T13:55:00.000-05:002016-08-10T13:55:16.930-05:00Feelings and fake hair Hello friends! It is day 3 after my initial chemo and I'm still riding the Decadron train to energyville (Decadron is a steroid that I take for the first 4 days to help with side effects and produce energy. Alas I had to forfeit my Olympic dreams for doping, but I figure killing cancer is more important than becoming an Olympic athlete)<br />
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To catch up, my good friend Jen and I went to a local salon to look at wigs, since we are now on the countdown to total hair loss (it's looking like that will probably be next Friday). Unfortunately, the wigs at the salon were mostly brunette or gray, I couldn't get a great feeling for color so we special ordered two that are more my style. I also learned that real hair wigs are super pricey and harder to maintain (plus it did give me a bit of the willies wearing someone else's hair on my head, I didn't expect that). I also discovered that my insurance company does not cover the cost of a wig so this will be all out of pocket. I have recently connected with another young breast cancer survivor that also has United Healthcare. She wrote <a href="https://grancerblog.wordpress.com/2016/06/29/dear-mr-hemsley/" target="_blank">this powerful letter</a> on her blog and in the end, United Healthcare covered her for 1 wig as an exception. So it looks like I may need to try to do the same....<br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Black isn't really my color</td></tr>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiyeuC3Ul3VEJ8i6WldE7_9kkiohk89j2gKKzTjWYAa1M8eqccleifCXtXWn-f9J1ViXmg37WfeYepWMBcucvMGibpeGcVuZeTI6jnGjQfS2_pK5n2OwTRMMylJfGSNMtElT3_x7iA3OOs/s1600/20160809_102457.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"></a></div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Or mullet </td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgoA-RB7kR2V2U9YuI_Kps1z4SSGz7TiiK-3eraxGgu1vCtISnw0FLuhkC7ycGOGFoqXZbe9T8HYR3gUb_harV0r2LDIo-JcxIbKqxE6WU87kpTQo557obMYNK5JUwdB5nuQIq4FDbLA98/s1600/IMG_0182%255B1%255D.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgoA-RB7kR2V2U9YuI_Kps1z4SSGz7TiiK-3eraxGgu1vCtISnw0FLuhkC7ycGOGFoqXZbe9T8HYR3gUb_harV0r2LDIo-JcxIbKqxE6WU87kpTQo557obMYNK5JUwdB5nuQIq4FDbLA98/s320/IMG_0182%255B1%255D.jpg" width="240" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Or Hillary Clinton</td></tr>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiejRXjFgyqNeahdpTU-Zr35cDhSGdcOnCWvsVYq8PW8B8tloCMiyuTOHOP4wOuhWmfje6eccgjuUcHnqfF9VzjctSHJJnW0xO_hpGSchusW0N5aN8nM5Pcgl02M63ovXFM-ilRFTy2rTI/s1600/IMG_0185%255B1%255D.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiejRXjFgyqNeahdpTU-Zr35cDhSGdcOnCWvsVYq8PW8B8tloCMiyuTOHOP4wOuhWmfje6eccgjuUcHnqfF9VzjctSHJJnW0xO_hpGSchusW0N5aN8nM5Pcgl02M63ovXFM-ilRFTy2rTI/s320/IMG_0185%255B1%255D.jpg" width="240" /></a><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjbjsMAeUgbLwdPUoWQer0ElwaksEwcT2Ux8_5WttYh7upzVyy_WpLInIFmxkymjXst-_zK3TyTrR6cs3ZJ-0NHPmbluvR2UN4RM5WunEX1xZGfAxBEAs-mgcvy9T3K48E-_XJG-7_KTtU/s1600/IMG_0184%255B1%255D.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjbjsMAeUgbLwdPUoWQer0ElwaksEwcT2Ux8_5WttYh7upzVyy_WpLInIFmxkymjXst-_zK3TyTrR6cs3ZJ-0NHPmbluvR2UN4RM5WunEX1xZGfAxBEAs-mgcvy9T3K48E-_XJG-7_KTtU/s320/IMG_0184%255B1%255D.jpg" width="240" /></a></div>
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These are the two I ordered, the left wig in a more auburn color like the bottom picture and the right wig as shown in the picture. They should hopefully arrive sometime this week for me to try on and make a decision.</div>
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Yesterday was my Neulasta shot, which is a tiny shot into the fat of my belly that helps boost white blood cell counts during treatments. It also has severe bone pain as a side effect, so I am taking my zyrtec and zantac to hopefully combat that (not quite sure how/why it works but I'm going with it!) Since I needed a little pep in my step, I put on my "I'm a ray of sunshine" cardigan and walked confidently out the door.</div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Coffee, water, meds and blogging, my new normal</td></tr>
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After going to my appt and running a few errands, mom and I watched "Mother's Day" and enjoyed a little downtime on the couch. Overall for day 2, I felt pretty normal1</div>
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This morning is day 3 and I'm still on quite a bit of meds. Since I still have a good amount of energy right now, Mom and I started sorting through the girls clothes to get ready to sell at consignment this fall. We need to get some of this baby stuff out of the house!!</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi1diZxIhRlqBY3vEnSBovmFy4AMj3CcYpxm500HbtpqgKUnDTCkFUKlP9N4h9Nd03fgP-QeFY5yvckFERDMXVYOI_S-GYXbuyVtwHdHrNwa5ZrlOY7l7j7sQEg-eZmK28BbGcDzuSRli8/s1600/20160810_115502.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi1diZxIhRlqBY3vEnSBovmFy4AMj3CcYpxm500HbtpqgKUnDTCkFUKlP9N4h9Nd03fgP-QeFY5yvckFERDMXVYOI_S-GYXbuyVtwHdHrNwa5ZrlOY7l7j7sQEg-eZmK28BbGcDzuSRli8/s320/20160810_115502.jpg" width="240" /></a></div>
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Again, I feel pretty normal for day 3 (likely thanks to my meds) other than I have the worst case of dry mouth and all food/liquid tastes chalky and dry. Totally tolerable side effect compared to the others they warned us about but it is a bit annoying and is impacting my appetite. So I'm going for a pb&j and some chips for lunch, hoping it tastes half way decent!<br />
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Not much more to report right now, but I know a lot of you have been wondering how I have been feeling, so far so good! I am a bit terrified of what will happen on Friday when many of my meds stop but we will cross that bridge when we get to it.<br />
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Thank you for all the prayers, I truly believe they are working! Love to all of you!!Lindsayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01769555972790205358noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8502919743303964197.post-16286543479245128912016-08-09T08:27:00.000-05:002016-08-09T08:27:29.329-05:00Cycle 1 Day 1: A chemo oddesy<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
We have embarked upon our maiden voyage of the USS Chemo, find your bunks and put on your lifejackets, we may be navigating some rough seas...thus begins Cycle 1 Day 1.</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiUQnL4O8rg3TgZcS23dY0WbTwr9A4qijjCPbtYoQvcHrmyYu7uLxoQ6cUuPXNKSqHHnejNacFpHd06x3hE48ScJpPDRnjvXkd3I7_vKxvRzbnBzphpo_MfUIowMRYEAGb12kFg99DculM/s1600/cancer+treatment+center.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiUQnL4O8rg3TgZcS23dY0WbTwr9A4qijjCPbtYoQvcHrmyYu7uLxoQ6cUuPXNKSqHHnejNacFpHd06x3hE48ScJpPDRnjvXkd3I7_vKxvRzbnBzphpo_MfUIowMRYEAGb12kFg99DculM/s320/cancer+treatment+center.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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We checked into the cancer center around my appt. time at 8 am and then sat for almost 20 minutes before we got called back. No snap chat shenanigans ensued but we did discuss the phenomenon of medical waiting rooms ( I had the first appointment time of the day, what are we <i>waiting</i> for?) </div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Muffins, water and saline flushes, yum!</td></tr>
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A nice lady named Andrea called us back to B pod where my infusions would occur. She took my weight and height so they could dose my chemo drugs according to my personal specifications (special drugs, just for ME!) and took a set of vitals, during which my normally low blood pressure gave her a bit of a pause (90s/50s, meh.) Mitch and I pulled out our homemade blueberry muffins (thanks Mama Leona!) and water bottles and we were ready to get started.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj68CTHQ9N7LvNosftFBdHwfHW7ploCShN0OP7BwIS3PDdWN3b0Kikgdq6GSpx_2xGU3FhdQ5LA-pgWbJOqFquxSnJqaLvTMrHgG7l98XMNzGUape6ehIPYGlrzSJDXjxUfojPZY1dQOTI/s1600/power+port.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj68CTHQ9N7LvNosftFBdHwfHW7ploCShN0OP7BwIS3PDdWN3b0Kikgdq6GSpx_2xGU3FhdQ5LA-pgWbJOqFquxSnJqaLvTMrHgG7l98XMNzGUape6ehIPYGlrzSJDXjxUfojPZY1dQOTI/s1600/power+port.jpg" /></a><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjyVlzqrHMWuYFIkQM2G0kz2WvelNSRC5la1i3hIdVqxTnN3mId3VhpwNDD84XjukGzneZ5PoSCQp68wVqiJzO7cHbtYk9ZBemIJCHWWxngYWH-I_pkd4jVjJzbt43DWzIpm5WLYiNaAvE/s1600/PowerPortInsertion.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjyVlzqrHMWuYFIkQM2G0kz2WvelNSRC5la1i3hIdVqxTnN3mId3VhpwNDD84XjukGzneZ5PoSCQp68wVqiJzO7cHbtYk9ZBemIJCHWWxngYWH-I_pkd4jVjJzbt43DWzIpm5WLYiNaAvE/s1600/PowerPortInsertion.jpg" /></a></div>
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Then a lukewarm nurse named Mary Ann came over an "accessed my port" which is a bit like docking a boat. From the picture above, you can see exactly what I have under my skin (left picture). Then the nurse popped the infusion set into my <i>POWERPORT </i>(super heroes unite!), similar to the picture on the right. They put a dressing over it and then hung some saline to get it going.</div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">The good news is, thanks to EMLA cream and freezie spray, I didn't feel the infusion set go in at all</td></tr>
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<span style="text-align: left;">Then I received about an hour of premeds, <a href="http://www.aloxi.com/about/default.aspx" target="_blank">IV Aloxi</a>, <a href="https://www.drugs.com/dosage/emend-injection.html" target="_blank">IV Emend</a>, and <a href="http://chemocare.com/chemotherapy/drug-info/dexamethasone.aspx" target="_blank">IV Decadron</a>, all to help with nausea side effects of my chemo. All of these infusions took about an hour to go in, since they have to run individually. In the meantime, Mitch and I played <a href="https://www.amazon.com/Click-Buy-DOW-7201-Ticket/dp/0975277324" target="_blank">Ticket to Ride</a> and I actually won!!</span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiZUJWWUxa26NuvHwAbIKQfC8DKRTSiVQhqwgSrt3y7MHrwyzDp9jbg2yXE6pavaPwa1uBFo-B1PC0XqcmjW4sqajarauOx6_W8bbilsOg0Hif1D9aOxai_bCelmMx2wXiyGr0wSfa0WAI/s1600/20160808_102814.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiZUJWWUxa26NuvHwAbIKQfC8DKRTSiVQhqwgSrt3y7MHrwyzDp9jbg2yXE6pavaPwa1uBFo-B1PC0XqcmjW4sqajarauOx6_W8bbilsOg0Hif1D9aOxai_bCelmMx2wXiyGr0wSfa0WAI/s320/20160808_102814.jpg" width="240" /></a></div>
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After my premeds went in, it was time for the big guns, IV <a href="http://www.breastcancer.org/treatment/druglist/adriamycin" target="_blank">Adriamycin</a>, or the "red devil". I have to admit, even the sight of her was a bit intimidating. It was given slow IV push (~30 mins) and has some wicked side effects (hair loss, mouth sores, nausea/vomiting, orange pee (this was a shock!) and less commonly, heart failure). The good news is, I didn't feel anything when it was going in so that's a bonus!</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgh2Hol8SVTnMx9zCgDKLxoLH00QU86mnL8lcILbFGC5rgGW25_qA9UjJ6vRrLjh5ZxgV4Aj5bl-RsyIwdrdBUAyJbYfXKlfPxNabNnddxQ6gIn-j7fq6S8JItUHIRqTxHSFuSXoxnOaPQ/s1600/20160808_092503.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgh2Hol8SVTnMx9zCgDKLxoLH00QU86mnL8lcILbFGC5rgGW25_qA9UjJ6vRrLjh5ZxgV4Aj5bl-RsyIwdrdBUAyJbYfXKlfPxNabNnddxQ6gIn-j7fq6S8JItUHIRqTxHSFuSXoxnOaPQ/s320/20160808_092503.jpg" width="240" /></a></div>
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Next up was the IV <a href="http://www.breastcancer.org/treatment/druglist/cytoxan" target="_blank">Cytoxan</a>, which also infused over ~30 mins. I had very mild side effects during this infusion, I can best describe it as a mild sinus headache- tension across my forehead, fullness and burning in my sinuses, all together very tolerable.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhMTA-2uK4huyI8hmfonSkRTTYXAxv4VOWdMOyyu8fpw6pY_f-OkoDPQpksWQ4tl-AKsuE8Hv5dCwGPTGeBuipJtrbme7jm_PdkD8Xn_pKO6rmTLUv6gSqkVOTdRnWh6BHp8zzKZKRF86A/s1600/20160808_103452.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhMTA-2uK4huyI8hmfonSkRTTYXAxv4VOWdMOyyu8fpw6pY_f-OkoDPQpksWQ4tl-AKsuE8Hv5dCwGPTGeBuipJtrbme7jm_PdkD8Xn_pKO6rmTLUv6gSqkVOTdRnWh6BHp8zzKZKRF86A/s320/20160808_103452.jpg" width="240" /></a><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjlwl7Wxoh3C6jJB5QOJ76fidUT59k3sRjY99uA26fCEo7JovPPLAh0nNmEphujKpV4Qcv6b0d8i_uRvpFVf5fNgpj8eWhEsslQO4zlggJmK-aTYV6M9u6w_kRTYNMy0N4LXTCuufWc3xg/s1600/20160808_092559.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjlwl7Wxoh3C6jJB5QOJ76fidUT59k3sRjY99uA26fCEo7JovPPLAh0nNmEphujKpV4Qcv6b0d8i_uRvpFVf5fNgpj8eWhEsslQO4zlggJmK-aTYV6M9u6w_kRTYNMy0N4LXTCuufWc3xg/s320/20160808_092559.jpg" width="240" /></a></div>
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So, we played another round of ticket to ride again, and I won, AGAIN!! (friends, this man beats me all.the.time. You can't comprehend how amazing it felt to beat him 2 times in a row!!)<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiHEw1-catvpvb3xPibgTlFFRRhyphenhyphen7SN-9bRJsUZ7OSn5pGSQgrZg8c8okDRDccdcVJjBFfzw51PCPgdCDYkmIHgaySfMjRUxpjHr15BI1ZhlzVyI1a98rbLbolzy9Sqy_FGSeArz0zQpf4/s1600/20160808_102916.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiHEw1-catvpvb3xPibgTlFFRRhyphenhyphen7SN-9bRJsUZ7OSn5pGSQgrZg8c8okDRDccdcVJjBFfzw51PCPgdCDYkmIHgaySfMjRUxpjHr15BI1ZhlzVyI1a98rbLbolzy9Sqy_FGSeArz0zQpf4/s320/20160808_102916.jpg" width="240" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Maybe it was a pity win because #cancer. Whatever the reason, I'll take it!</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
We left the treatment center around 11, roughly 3 hours in total, which I think is pretty manageable. I was feeling pretty good still so did a bit of shopping and then grabbed lunch as flattop.<br />
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiEob7zl6b-rlCb1AzlUXwn9BBv51XXWeofWGLu-z5WSbB1df1ROEUEIX-B-8WfUp1bYfc1fs_CrdbJOMdEAcLkmh7M0_om1sauvCE4m4Kej-J36t0EoDi6MOSdzf4OcjQ7bQQWNC-1IFk/s1600/20160808_113812.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiEob7zl6b-rlCb1AzlUXwn9BBv51XXWeofWGLu-z5WSbB1df1ROEUEIX-B-8WfUp1bYfc1fs_CrdbJOMdEAcLkmh7M0_om1sauvCE4m4Kej-J36t0EoDi6MOSdzf4OcjQ7bQQWNC-1IFk/s320/20160808_113812.jpg" width="240" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Words can not express how much I LOVE this man</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
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Mitch had to run to Home Depot to get an electrical box of some kind. I took this photo to document the time where Mitch spent under $0.50 at Home Depot because surely this is a once in a lifetime experience and it will never happen again.<br />
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Then we came home, I floated in the pool for about an hour, watched a couple of episodes of Sex and the City and then it was time to go get a smoothie and pick the girls up from daycare. All the while, I was still feeling pretty good. Best way to describe it would be like a mild hangover- small headache, a little woozy, a little nauseous. The smoothie hit the spot!<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjSeYCgPe_jhcd1zj9g1XBH_pVAVhy2EeQqHcZY5lv8eRpGhFwBt9erBBUfUz-4-ZBr95OSDhwb1a77p6MMqaUPhWD_NPGSj_tOS0xoxDelxnikx_V8xEA43zYNccLbHPWDQLjuC4fp_ZI/s1600/20160808_173832.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjSeYCgPe_jhcd1zj9g1XBH_pVAVhy2EeQqHcZY5lv8eRpGhFwBt9erBBUfUz-4-ZBr95OSDhwb1a77p6MMqaUPhWD_NPGSj_tOS0xoxDelxnikx_V8xEA43zYNccLbHPWDQLjuC4fp_ZI/s320/20160808_173832.jpg" width="240" /></a></div>
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When it came time for dinner, I was getting increasingly tired so I went upstairs to lay down while the family ate. Being the good husband he is, Mitch came up around 7:30 and told me I was getting out of bed and going for a walk, as much as I didn't want to, I did as I was told and it was actually very helpful. Sweet Evelyn was happy the whole time per usual.<br />
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And Kate insisted on playing "monsters". I will leave you with the photo evidence below<br />
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As a wrap up, chemo day one has been kind to me, I now am on a strict medical regimen that makes me look like a grandma but if it helps me function, I guess its worth it! Hopefully today continues to be a good day.<br />
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Before I close the post, I do want to say a heartfelt thank you to EVERYONE that has been so unbelievably supportive to me and our family over the past few weeks. I know we have prayer warriors all over the country and Mitch and I appreciate every single one of you lifting us up in your prayers to our God. This week, we specifically need prayers for minimal side effects for Lindsay, strength for Mitch and a sense of normalcy for our girls, as they can tell something isn't quite right.<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgZDKYLGhf3k9TYOlgKzpjNT8qofXH9jtNuVTHptzuaDxwmV86kcARxnw53RMmRo_zuDjJT7Iux2cOy4ZGY_mWLtSIAx22z33x5oBicj4YHPX9Z1XIZVQUMlOeJnzwN3MheW9QNyqESG54/s1600/Snapchat-3222789763844868065.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgZDKYLGhf3k9TYOlgKzpjNT8qofXH9jtNuVTHptzuaDxwmV86kcARxnw53RMmRo_zuDjJT7Iux2cOy4ZGY_mWLtSIAx22z33x5oBicj4YHPX9Z1XIZVQUMlOeJnzwN3MheW9QNyqESG54/s320/Snapchat-3222789763844868065.jpg" width="180" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Hoping to prevent turning into this crazy character!</td></tr>
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For the gifts and the cards and the hugs and the prayers, we say thank you!!</div>
Lindsayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01769555972790205358noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8502919743303964197.post-80223608149427810042016-08-07T20:29:00.001-05:002016-08-07T20:29:06.885-05:00The countdown begins<p dir="ltr">Tomorrow is the day, the day I officially become a cancer patient. The day poison will be dripped into my veins to kill an invader I didn't ask for. I will put on my brave face and walk in ready to beat this because the alternative is so much worse. But right now, I just want to hide.</p>
<p dir="ltr">Tomorrow is the day I will nurse my sweet baby for the last time, which I've been doing for more than 400 days. Both a blessing and a curse, my breasts serving a functional and an emotional purpose, while being the very enemy that put us in this position.</p>
<p dir="ltr">I don't have any motivating quotes or funny jokes. No light hearted pictures or goofy cartoons. Just me and my raw emotion, counting down the minutes until tomorrow morning when everything changes. Wishing time would slow down yet speed up all at the same time. Prayers are welcome, we are going to need them...</p>
Lindsayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01769555972790205358noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8502919743303964197.post-39398529649164502992016-08-02T22:40:00.000-05:002016-08-02T22:40:57.464-05:00Open Road<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiiTRQsLoYySax_Wd4sIcxgIeXGaX0coZbOdeQwoYqnZY3E-0NYEkoy0FLJK7iLwbBnv-Fd6SM0Wv-KsmKbq0zVTuFTdvGM2i3U5XTYpsJyRKeN3XKufd4nqe6g7-6Qblq2NmSeyh8LRwg/s1600/road.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiiTRQsLoYySax_Wd4sIcxgIeXGaX0coZbOdeQwoYqnZY3E-0NYEkoy0FLJK7iLwbBnv-Fd6SM0Wv-KsmKbq0zVTuFTdvGM2i3U5XTYpsJyRKeN3XKufd4nqe6g7-6Qblq2NmSeyh8LRwg/s320/road.jpg" width="286" /></a></div>
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Fun fact: Throughout my childhood/early adulthood, I dabbled in many sports. Swimming, bowling, basketball, track and field, cross country, cheerleading, dance squad, crew. I did not excel in any of these sports, as a matter of fact, I performed just well enough in most of these to stay on the team until I became interested in something else.<br />
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The most comical of these was cross country, only due to my motivation for joining the team. In my high school, two sport athletes were exempt from gym. While I was actively involved in my dance team my junior year and cheerleading my senior year, they did not count as a "sport". Even more comical was that marching band (of which I was a member all 4 years) did. Explain that logic!<br />
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Anyway, my junior year of high school I badly wanted a study hall (yes, I'm a nerd) and the only way to accomplish that was to find a way out of gym.<br />
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So I joined the cross country team.<br />
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I will pause while that sinks in a minute. I WILLINGLY signed up to run hundreds of MILES in order to get out of 50 mins of "gym" three days a week. In every other sport I had played, coach made us run as punishment. Now I was doing it for fun.<br />
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It took me a while to gain endurance but throughout the season, my coach taught me a lot about running long distances. In races, he would always push us to "attack the hills", as that was the best time to pass an opponent, since most runners will slow down as the hill gets tougher. He also told us to use the downhills to catch our breath and prepare for the next hill. And most importantly, he always would yell (nicely) at us to finish strong, leave everything we had at the finish line.<br />
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I have carried these lessons with me as an adult and while I don't consider myself an expert runner, it has proven to be a great way to clear a cluttered mind.<br />
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Yesterday, we learned my cancer was indeed triple negative and my chemo plan would be:<br />
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<ul>
<li>4 cycles of Adriamycin, lovingly referred to as the "red devil", given IV once every 2 weeks. Most common side effects are nausea, fatigue, hair loss, constipation and mouth sores. </li>
<li>4 cycles of Cyclophosphamide, given IV once every 2 weeks, side effects are similar to Adriamycin</li>
<li>12 cycles of Taxol, given IV once every week. We will switch to this once my 4 cycles of the other two are done. I am told the side effects of this medication aren't nearly as bad.</li>
<li>In addition to these medications IV, I also have a whole host of other meds used to help combat the side effects. To be sure I am taking the right meds at the right time, I added it to our family calendar on the fridge:</li>
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Also, this happened yesterday:</div>
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We are now on the 3 week countdown to total hair loss, which I am predicting to be somewhere around Aug. 20-21. Which means I may not leave the house for a few days until I figure out how to tie a scarf. Anyone want to give me lessons?</div>
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Ultimately, I am really trying to keep a positive mindset through all of this (the power of positive thinking, right?). Yes, I have times when I am sad. Yes, this feels like some really crappy dream that I will snap out of any minute. Yes, I get mad that this has to happen to me and my family.</div>
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But friends, it's time to ATTACK THE HILL. To lean in, and push to the top, even when my muscles burn and my lungs are on fire. I can coast on the way down when its easy and save up that last shred of energy to finish strong. </div>
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So I'm lacing up my running shoes and hitting the open road, taking this race down. One hill at a time.</div>
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Lindsayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01769555972790205358noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8502919743303964197.post-29882767091251024182016-07-30T09:21:00.000-05:002016-07-30T09:21:15.168-05:00Positive or NegativeFor this blog post I'm going to get all educational for you, so if science or learning has not been your cup of tea, I will excuse you from reading the rest of this post. Grab me a snack on your way out, For those of you that enjoy learning how things work (<i>cough engineers cough</i>), then this post is for you. So let's get educated.<br />
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We will start at the very beginning (Julie Andrews anyone?)...<br />
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I have a tumor in my left breast, it is roughly 1.5 cm which I like to compare to the size of a large blueberry. This blueberry is a ball of cells that really wanted to be normal, but with a little peer pressure from the wrong crowd, began multiplying out of control, making it more difficult for the normal cells to do their job. Much like the hallway of a local high school, this group of "bad kids" will keep recruiting more and more kids to join their "gang" until there are no good kids left.<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjJesbYvKlL_f65pFcjpzvsiCxp8b7QkrpcCX7_WwJmRunPmjgnoJ5wpOc8eCHG8_GnWWo5VNAC-6HmTOoc6Y6XQmyKCxcWeO8YgFXC0vpODdG5b2JYaI1jdXNe__jOHOqluKaNRGotawU/s1600/blueberry.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjJesbYvKlL_f65pFcjpzvsiCxp8b7QkrpcCX7_WwJmRunPmjgnoJ5wpOc8eCHG8_GnWWo5VNAC-6HmTOoc6Y6XQmyKCxcWeO8YgFXC0vpODdG5b2JYaI1jdXNe__jOHOqluKaNRGotawU/s1600/blueberry.jpg" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">This guy is a real jerk.</td></tr>
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The good news is, every group of kids, or cells in this case, have a weakness, we just need to figure out what it is. Any time a breast tumor is identified, it helps to take a sample of the tissue to test for biomarkers, or receptors for tumor growth. If we can identify what type of receptor is feeding the growth of the tumor, we can hopefully turn it off, thus starving the tumor and stopping growth. It is really simple math. Oreos + my belly = muffin top. Take away the oreos, no more muffin top.<br />
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For breast cancer, there are three types of receptors doctors look for: Estrogen, Progesterone and HER2 (human epidermal growth factor receptor 2). If we can identify that the tumor has receptors for any of these 3 things, we can cut off the supply and at the very least, keep the cancer from spreading, if not eliminating it all together.<br />
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Estrogen and progesterone are two very important hormones in the female body, largely responsible for controlling fertility. They also can impact the growth of cells and in this case, the overgrowth of cells, leading to cancer. In addition, super smart scientists have also discovered the HER2 protein on breast cells and have linked higher levels of this protein to breast cancer. Enter stage left: the positive/negative game.<br />
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When I had my biopsy 2 weeks ago, they sent a sample of the tissue to a lab to test if I have any of these three receptors on my tumor. Eighty percent of women with BRCA2 gene mutations like me (this will be another future post entirely) have ER+ or estrogen receptors on their tumors. So naturally I believed I would be ER+, I would have surgery to remove my tumor, take an anti-estrogen medication to kill any remaining cells and go skipping off into the sunset because I have beat cancer. Mic drop.<br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Second Obama reference in a week? Must be an election year.</td></tr>
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Unfortunately for me, I tend not to follow the curve.<br />
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Last weekend, I received the unfortunate news that my markers had come back and that I was ER-, PG- and HER2 equivocal, which is a fancy scientific term for "I dunno". They would need to run an additional, more specific test on my tissue sample to determine if it is HER2 positive or negative. The even better news (sarcasm) is that regardless of that lab result, my tumor is not the preppy-kid-who-ditches-school bad, its the smokes-behind-the-bleachers-and-robs-the-liquor-store kind of bad. The aggressive, fast growing, take no prisoners kind of bad. It just got serious.<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhVzmnuwHT5lj_JoIlVpjfmeqHCkXGpesJ-NXqZXtgap1W2HXGNp6pZPROWIvaTiPWHJTk5YFMpCGaIo5oiOYwMkhzwLVsqkZNPtQQE7azQqRGRnID8hj1M1uZMUhu5SE54BayfAC7iwNQ/s1600/angry+blueberry.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhVzmnuwHT5lj_JoIlVpjfmeqHCkXGpesJ-NXqZXtgap1W2HXGNp6pZPROWIvaTiPWHJTk5YFMpCGaIo5oiOYwMkhzwLVsqkZNPtQQE7azQqRGRnID8hj1M1uZMUhu5SE54BayfAC7iwNQ/s320/angry+blueberry.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">That blueberry, he can be pretty mouthy too!</td></tr>
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If I have an HER2 positive tumor, I will receive 3 medications to turn off the gene that creates the HER2 protein that is making my cells grow out of control. One of these medications is only approved by the FDA to be given prior to surgery, so if I am HER2 positive, I <u><i>must </i></u>have treatment before surgery. I will have 18 weeks of treatment, followed by surgery to remove all breast tissue, and then continue to get an infusion of one of the medications for up to a year. While all of this sounds pretty terrible, the good news is this treatment is very effective and can cure up to 50% of patients completely prior to surgery.<br />
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If I do not have an HER2 positive tumor, I am then branded as a "triple negative" breast cancer patient. Triple negative breast cancers are tough to treat because there are no known receptors for the tumor. We have no way of knowing exactly how to turn it off. For this reason, my oncologist is recommending we do chemo prior to surgery because then we are able to use my tumor as a barometer for how well treatment is working. Getting smaller? Good news. Not get smaller? Not good news. Since we don't know any receptors for this type of tumor, removing the tumor prior to surgery would make it more difficult to confirm that the medication I am getting is actually working on my specific tumor type. So either way we look at it, we are set up for chemo ASAP.<br />
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My oncologist assured us that the results of this second lab test would be back within a few days, so we would know by Wednesday or Thursday this week what my result should be. Once we know my result, then we will know which chemo plan we are going with and can start treatments. For reasons unknown to me, it's Friday and we still have no results. No positive or negative and now the waiting game continues.<br />
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In the meantime, we will stay busy. My mom flies in today to move into our basement for an undetermined period of time. If I catch her sleeping during the day and playing video games all night, she's gettin a job! We have date night planned for tonight and a lot of playing with kiddos for the next two days until my appointment at the cancer center Monday morning. Hope you all enjoy your weekend and I'll update again on Monday!<br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">My sidekick at work on Thursday</td></tr>
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<br />Lindsayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01769555972790205358noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8502919743303964197.post-62029391188843942552016-07-27T22:29:00.000-05:002016-07-27T22:45:12.968-05:00The waiting game<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Well friends, a lot has happened in the last two days, let me recap.</div>
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Tuesday, 11 am<br />
I received a call from the oncology office asking if I could be available at 2:15 that afternoon to meet with my new oncology doctor, because they had a cancellation. Yay! Of course I could be available!<br />
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Tuesday, 2:15 pm<br />
Mitch and I arrive at the oncology office and immediately I'm blown away by how much older everyone is in the waiting room. Like decades older. This immediately adds to my anxiety but I shove the lump that's in my throat back down to my belly and walk up to the receptionist to check in.<br />
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Tuesday, 2:30-3:15 pm<br />
I fill out a ton of paperwork and commence waiting in the waiting room, which is packed with people. Continue to watch people be called back behind the magical door of mystery while we wait.<br />
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Tuesday 3:15-3:45 pm<br />
We are still in the waiting room and now an hour past our appointment time. Mitch and I are both starting to get tense, so we break the tension by playing on snapchat.<br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Mitch LOVES giraffes, he actually gasped out loud when he found this filter.</td></tr>
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Tuesday, 3:45 pm</div>
It's my turn to enter the magical door of mystery only to discover a scale, blood pressure cuff and several exam rooms. After doing the usual height, weight and measure, we are put in an exam room to, you guessed it, WAIT SOME MORE.<br />
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Tuesday 4:00ish pm<br />
Jay, Mitch's brother, challenges me to look in Mitch's ears with the otoscope. Never one to turn down a challenge, ear check complete!<br />
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As I mentioned before, there is a lot of science that I will explain in a future post about breast cancer and how it is treated, but for the sake of this post, here is a very high level summary of what we know and what we learned.</div>
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<li>We still need one more test back to determine what chemo plan I will need to kill this unwelcomed visitor in my left breast. We took the opportunity at this appointment to briefly discuss each plan</li>
<li>I will definitely need chemo prior to having surgery, so I will need a port (a little button that is inserted under my skin that feeds in my vein to allow for easier IV infusions of chemo) and an echo (an ultrasound of my heart, because chemo drugs are hard on heart tissue so they want to make sure my ticker is good and strong before they poison it with medications). This should happen sometime this week.</li>
<li>We will follow up on Monday with the Nurse Practitioner to discuss what chemo plan we are going with. After some baseline labs, she will provide us with a ton of education on what medications I will receive, how often, side effects, etc.</li>
<li>Once I have my port and insurance has approved my plan, I will get my first infusion, so we are likely looking at that happening sometime next week.</li>
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We finally left the appointment around 4:45 and headed home to pick up the girls. Honestly, it was a whirlwind of a day and I was left feeling unsettled for most of the night, I didn't connect with my oncologist like I had hoped, probably due to the fact that we waited 2 hours to see her. She comes very highly recommended so I'm going to set aside our first impressions and hope that our next encounter is a bit more positive.</div>
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The good news is I rounded out the night talking with Sarah, my bestie from college, for an hour an a half, a lot about cancer, our kids and a little bit about medical marijuana. It made me laugh, it helped me vent and it gave me a positive end to my night, which is what I really needed. </div>
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgUoiONPhnbghTyBHchUC4YPH9g7TLc7zwsObaMH63OYbbGxE9mVQs9ua8r7CHZo0m4Bn2eo4SKKg-2uYflOUo2__AQAtIFHGz3l1008W5bgUTY4WYgrlzugdQmSUj55RR2vyAf-Zr_WMA/s1600/sarah.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgUoiONPhnbghTyBHchUC4YPH9g7TLc7zwsObaMH63OYbbGxE9mVQs9ua8r7CHZo0m4Bn2eo4SKKg-2uYflOUo2__AQAtIFHGz3l1008W5bgUTY4WYgrlzugdQmSUj55RR2vyAf-Zr_WMA/s320/sarah.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Photo stolen from Facebook circa 2010-- don't worry, we still look this young and rested.</td></tr>
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Wednesday, 10 am<br />
Oncology office calls, port and echo (sounds like a fine wine or something) are scheduled for tomorrow at 11 am/2 pm. Sweet, let's get this over with. I text Mitch (he is in training all week for work) and start to figure out a plan.<br />
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Wednesday, 12:30 pm<br />
Mitch calls me back and we decide that he should attend training tomorrow and I can have a friend stay with me for placement and take me home (they give me the good drugs so I can't be trusted to drive or be home alone for at least 12 hours). I get everything lined up and we are good to go.<br />
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Wednesday, 4 pm<br />
My phone rings, caller is UNAVAILABLE, which means two things, daycare or doctors. I tentatively answer the phone to find out that Evelyn has a fever and cant go to daycare tomorrow.<br />
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Wednesday, 4:01 pm<br />
$#^%$&#&^%*^%#*^#%*^*^%*^&*(#%^*%#<br />
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Wednesday, 4:30 pm<br />
I wrap things up in my office to go pick up our kid, who looks and acts completely fine (seriously, this kid gets kicked out of daycare ALL THE TIME, she's a master manipulator). The older one on the other hand has a massive tantrum on the way out of daycare because she doesn't want to leave. I bribe her with Shopkins and get her in the van.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhDTiVuRn396Xlxk8aKrv3dofGewUn46SVeNUM4RubdBxPbli-lfbZUZ3GiEJPq94_rnwJcTXm7hcUvGAuV1mQwPyHLhsjS3TuJruus6E24I-YMhxMKKmBvo5vIKKVFdeuIAOtyhbvWZ3k/s1600/shopkins.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhDTiVuRn396Xlxk8aKrv3dofGewUn46SVeNUM4RubdBxPbli-lfbZUZ3GiEJPq94_rnwJcTXm7hcUvGAuV1mQwPyHLhsjS3TuJruus6E24I-YMhxMKKmBvo5vIKKVFdeuIAOtyhbvWZ3k/s200/shopkins.jpg" width="175" /></a></div>
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Wednesday, 7:00 pm<br />
We get tomorrow figured out, crisis averted for now. Enjoy playing with the girls and take this time to laugh with them.<br />
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And now, here I am, Wednesday, 10:30, summing up my day for you. Tomorrow, I will take my first big step in transitioning to full on cancer patient, which really blows. But, I gotta play the cards I've been dealt. There will be a time when I will look back on this and remember it as simple bump in the road, but for now, it feels like a mountain. At least I've got a good crew to push me to the top. Much love and sweet dreams!<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj6mdZuYoL1zVbxrlce-g0BYQSRXLX-2rY7P9i5-SxDhMMSjpnbUOdkvpm5dyb9kaqTJM6IstlcObATsyljWfo565yNMgN1rEv_-5ZdNRWCVMofaINLXP_KI3kkKgI0xbHaW0Lv_sFb6GI/s1600/20160727_192305.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj6mdZuYoL1zVbxrlce-g0BYQSRXLX-2rY7P9i5-SxDhMMSjpnbUOdkvpm5dyb9kaqTJM6IstlcObATsyljWfo565yNMgN1rEv_-5ZdNRWCVMofaINLXP_KI3kkKgI0xbHaW0Lv_sFb6GI/s320/20160727_192305.jpg" width="240" /></a></div>
<br />Lindsayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01769555972790205358noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8502919743303964197.post-57372554654094203002016-07-24T16:43:00.000-05:002016-07-24T16:43:42.858-05:00Birthday cakeSo, tomorrow is Mitch's birthday and although we don't usually make a big deal about birthdays around here, we at least use it as an excuse to eat some cake. Mitch's favorite cake is spice cake, so this morning, Kate and I set off to the store to get everything we would need to make a cake.<br />
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Normally I would be all Betty Crocker and make it from scratch, but I simply didn't have the energy for that today so Duncan Hines had to pinch hit (who can turn down pudding in the mix?). We were all pretty down with the <a href="https://fearnothingriskeverything.blogspot.com/2016/07/it-was-best-of-times-it-was-worst-of.html" target="_blank">news we received yesterday</a> so I woke up this morning with a new attitude that we were going to have a good family fun day. I wanted to have some special 1:1 time with Kate, so off we headed to the store with her shopping cart in tow. I will let the pictures tell the rest of the story...<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhVhzR1nLy_dfA-Y6ali1ESMnquMHj6XiZAseRD3j-OMB-cN0buNwhAvH5LQ43hLEIrrJcU5uCTwA4RegceYurDrNKjovfQDAGsFoJ8cCkQhlJjpf68BAti3br-zAbIN8ejfsNSlpqhTQo/s1600/20160724_084527.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhVhzR1nLy_dfA-Y6ali1ESMnquMHj6XiZAseRD3j-OMB-cN0buNwhAvH5LQ43hLEIrrJcU5uCTwA4RegceYurDrNKjovfQDAGsFoJ8cCkQhlJjpf68BAti3br-zAbIN8ejfsNSlpqhTQo/s320/20160724_084527.jpg" width="240" /></a></div>
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Please note, exhibit A: 3 year old wearing Anna dress with unbrushed hair to the local grocery store. If this doesn't scream independent pre-schooler, I don't know what will.</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiFVcuR3bHXtT8TisTbx2st8wbhgzHPjLGcJm2sjMdk0m1TSF8tK6nyVQGs0dZtSTZTOdpKvrZGVNPx43gzsWZQbMYTqfMep_OnCZS8-r5Duml7CcQc1VpthACx8whhGGEgVexvt5v6Vuc/s1600/20160724_084531.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiFVcuR3bHXtT8TisTbx2st8wbhgzHPjLGcJm2sjMdk0m1TSF8tK6nyVQGs0dZtSTZTOdpKvrZGVNPx43gzsWZQbMYTqfMep_OnCZS8-r5Duml7CcQc1VpthACx8whhGGEgVexvt5v6Vuc/s320/20160724_084531.jpg" width="240" /></a></div>
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Into IGA we go, she is a very focused shopper.</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgDKiEmZ0c4d-B-oaNmWipmkfe076w9XuZrq67BxnjNwdpn2q_2nv8lL9rGkLzWWuKCqDA5fcl8YGqdjpMbSbDAaYUrOs2Rc0q0fm26v2l3de3KArZU8EkoscoeVwsbDAPhCSt8HLd7pXk/s1600/20160724_084753.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgDKiEmZ0c4d-B-oaNmWipmkfe076w9XuZrq67BxnjNwdpn2q_2nv8lL9rGkLzWWuKCqDA5fcl8YGqdjpMbSbDAaYUrOs2Rc0q0fm26v2l3de3KArZU8EkoscoeVwsbDAPhCSt8HLd7pXk/s320/20160724_084753.jpg" width="240" /></a></div>
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First stop, butter for cream cheese frosting. She said Elsa was crying and didn't want to be in the cart. </div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEguVQTAxn3HgpB8SyqVeBgUoRZS8UQVKukPJXd4LwrvyNLh0EvzScvkKRW0Q1mJlqjFJVZfC6GaxPRRP-JWWFro5IcL7YwOS4z4kWrDq-Aurh1i7bDpp99uUuTO9bm60ZhLyiCIMLiAeXg/s1600/20160724_084915.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEguVQTAxn3HgpB8SyqVeBgUoRZS8UQVKukPJXd4LwrvyNLh0EvzScvkKRW0Q1mJlqjFJVZfC6GaxPRRP-JWWFro5IcL7YwOS4z4kWrDq-Aurh1i7bDpp99uUuTO9bm60ZhLyiCIMLiAeXg/s320/20160724_084915.jpg" width="240" /></a></div>
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Her baby has settled down and now its time for cake mix, the real star of the show.</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhIt_5AfhCt5rt5H_baJzJP7JoOTd5Pp_sKVcOOSWDVmYJb6TZ9tFLgGz4-as7sj9z1Xk13u_DXVNTatz7YQ6MmCezPgHP_tDleRGafzOy27Pp2lf_27oxbhla7oNggInvb-4_AWCO8XYw/s1600/20160724_084936.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhIt_5AfhCt5rt5H_baJzJP7JoOTd5Pp_sKVcOOSWDVmYJb6TZ9tFLgGz4-as7sj9z1Xk13u_DXVNTatz7YQ6MmCezPgHP_tDleRGafzOy27Pp2lf_27oxbhla7oNggInvb-4_AWCO8XYw/s320/20160724_084936.jpg" width="240" /></a></div>
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Good thing the sugar is toward the bottom of the display!</div>
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We couldn't leave without the macaroni! Her words, not mine...</div>
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Time to check out! She unloaded the entire cart herself.</div>
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Loading into the van and time to head home. Our shopping trip is complete!</div>
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In all seriousness, this morning lifted my spirits so high and spending this quality time with my girl made me so happy. Not to mention, she is awful darn cute! Now its time to make some cake!</div>
Lindsayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01769555972790205358noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8502919743303964197.post-76233269212292114442016-07-23T22:15:00.000-05:002016-07-23T22:45:07.256-05:00It was the best of times, it was the worst of times<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjCeheqmFCTHA05cZD1VtA8VF62vpdlFcrOreNNWVkY-cLtFHUjFm1oosknbrUgUoGn9Y1lp7ZgPeDR0sSXXHAejaSXpT1q8v53rsSlqCwye5-XFqjPJVYqqqCDFrstW9hhPCgCo7lvGho/s1600/rollercoaster.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="251" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjCeheqmFCTHA05cZD1VtA8VF62vpdlFcrOreNNWVkY-cLtFHUjFm1oosknbrUgUoGn9Y1lp7ZgPeDR0sSXXHAejaSXpT1q8v53rsSlqCwye5-XFqjPJVYqqqCDFrstW9hhPCgCo7lvGho/s320/rollercoaster.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-size: medium;">So, over the past week, among the half million people that I have talked to, someone mentioned to me that we will encounter a series of highs and lows throughout my diagnosis. Let's take a look at just how accurate this has been so far:</span><br />
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<u><span style="font-size: medium;">My week, in summary:</span></u><br />
<span style="font-size: medium;">Monday:</span><br />
<span style="font-size: medium;"><span style="color: red;"><b>Low</b></span>, get diagnosed with invasive ductal carcinoma (for all my medical friends), breast cancer for the laypersons in the crowd. Although I felt "prepared" for this phone call and the possibility that I may have cancer, it still sucked to hear it.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: medium;">Tuesday:</span><br />
<span style="font-size: medium;"><b><span style="color: red;">Low</span></b>, wake up to the head cold that Evelyn has had for the last 2 weeks. I swear slimer from ghostbusters has slowly been making his way out of her nose. It's gross. And now I have it.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: medium;"><b><span style="color: lime;">High</span></b>, MRI gets moved up to Wednesday.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: medium;">Wednesday:</span><br />
<span style="font-size: medium;"><b><span style="color: lime;">High</span></b>, I survived my MRI without a total mental breakdown (piece of advice, when they ask you if you feel claustrophobic in small spaces, the answer should always be yes. Thank goodness for headphones and pandora). Got the results this afternoon, no new tumors and lymph nodes were clear.</span><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: small;">Even Obama was pleased with my results. Raise your glass, Mr. President.</span></td></tr>
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<span style="font-size: medium;">Thursday:</span><br />
<span style="font-size: medium;"><b><span style="color: red;">Low</span></b>, our air conditioner breaks on the HOTTEST DAY OF THE SUMMER. Because its the hottest day of the summer, the technician will not be able to look at it until tomorrow. Cue Vlaminck sleepover in the basement. Have you ever willingly gone to a sleepover with a 1 and 3 year old? Yeah, didn't think so. Luckily, they both slept through the night.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: medium;">Friday:</span><br />
<span style="font-size: medium;"><b><span style="color: lime;">High</span></b>, air conditioner is fixed, temp in the house maxes out at 88*. By midnight, its a cool 74*.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: medium;"><b><span style="color: lime;">Second high</span></b>, we hung out with our close friends and played several hilarious, and slightly inappropriate, rounds of Telestrations. If you have not yet played this game, stop reading this blog and head to amazon right now. Better yet, <a href="https://www.amazon.com/Telestrations-8-Player-The-Original/dp/B001SN8GF4/ref=sr_1_2?s=toys-and-games&ie=UTF8&qid=1469327037&sr=1-2&keywords=telestrations" target="_blank">here you go</a>. You can thank me later when the clue "appendicitis" turns into "kidney avalanche".</span><br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhLOi71KaJ4lg-9YvP6l93fiKqcIpvmbTbdV6u45O1e1OEDRlv2Ynz8BvdoEnLtyYIUnAK4udg6-ZXWCG9iX-PAlw7oqcQJnrGZNjQHIG_aFs_Qg670FRAs_tR4Be1zhFm3YJhfGMSBVXc/s1600/telestrations.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><span style="font-size: medium;"><img border="0" height="280" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhLOi71KaJ4lg-9YvP6l93fiKqcIpvmbTbdV6u45O1e1OEDRlv2Ynz8BvdoEnLtyYIUnAK4udg6-ZXWCG9iX-PAlw7oqcQJnrGZNjQHIG_aFs_Qg670FRAs_tR4Be1zhFm3YJhfGMSBVXc/s320/telestrations.png" width="320" /></span></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: small;">Love.these.people.</span></td></tr>
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<span style="font-size: medium;">Saturday:</span><br />
<span style="font-size: medium;"><span style="color: red;"><b>Low</b></span>, Meeting with the breast surgeon (Dr. M) and plastic surgeon (Dr. J). Both were wonderful, patient and kind, answered all our questions and gave us a lot of notes and resources. The low to this 2 hour meeting was that my tumor markers came back last night and it isn't what we had hoped. I have a lot of science that I can explain in another post, but ultimately I have a tumor that will require chemo before surgery. 18-20 weeks of chemo, IV infusions (which means I will need a port) every few weeks for several cycles.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: medium;">I have tried to prepare myself for the likely need for chemo, but hearing it today gave me the realization that I'm not ready. Not ready to feel sick, not ready to lose my hair, not ready to be a cancer patient for 5 months. Today has been a low my friends, but that momentum has to be carrying us up to our next high. Til next time...</span><br />
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<br />Lindsayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01769555972790205358noreply@blogger.com7